This April

Well. My least-favorite month of the year is here. April, I hate you so much. It’s nothing personal. The ninth anniversary of Madeline’s death is this Saturday. My friends are wonderful. They text me to check in, send jokes to make me smile, or little notes to let me know they’re thinking of us. I…

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She Would Be Ten

Madeline’s tenth birthday was on Saturday. Not long after her first birthday, I flipped ahead on the calendar and saw that her tenth birthday was going to be on a Saturday. Perfect for a blowout 10th birthday bash. Instead of planning a party, I withdrew into myself. I’ve been on autopilot for a while, without…

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Thoughts And Prayers

When Madeline died, people from all over the world sent us their thoughts and prayers. I’ve said hundreds of times that I don’t know what we would have done without them. The support and love held us up when we could hardly breathe. It meant (and still means) so much to us. But our family,…

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Déjà Vu

Last Monday I received a call from the elementary school nurse. Annabel was in her office, complaining of a bad headache, lethargy, and body aches. I picked her up from school, and when we got home she went straight to her bedroom and slept for hours. The next morning, she had a bit of a…

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A Decade Ago

Labor Day is a holiday that the honors the American labor movement and the contributions that workers have made to the strength, prosperity, laws, and well-being of the country…but for me, it will always be the anniversary of one of the scariest days of my life. Ten years ago on Labor Day, my water broke…

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