Annabel’s fish, Bubbles, died last Monday.

As you may recall, Annie won Bubbles at her school carnival back in October of 2015. YEP THAT FISH LIVED OVER TWO YEARS. I was not pleased that she won the fish, but Mike was stoked. Homeboy couldn’t wait to go buy a fish tank…and a fish for James, too. “For James.” He’s even upgraded the friggin’ tank.

I do not enjoy fish, in case that wasn’t obvious.

However, I was very sad for the kids. Mike discovered Bubbles at the bottom of the tank, and immediately went to inform me.

Mike: Heather, wake up.
Me: No. It’s early.
Mike: One of the fish died.
Me: I’M UP.

We told Annabel together, and she was very upset. We gave her lots of hugs, wiped away her tears, and answered her questions. When she asked what we’d do with Bubbles, Mike said, “Well, we’ll give her a nice funeral where we talk about how much we loved her, and then we’ll send her out to sea.”

Annabel: How do we send her out to sea?
Mike: Well, we flush her down the toilet.

The death of the fish had, at this point, not bothered James. Flushing a dead fish down a toilet was, apparently, his line.

Since he was so upset, James and I did not participate in the funeral. But I’m sure it was lovely. Pretty sure I heard a few notes of Amazing Grace come from the bathroom.

Meanwhile, James’ fish, Uptown Funk, was still alive…although he did look a little, oh, crazed. He kept swimming in a loop from the top of the tank to the bottom. I wondered to Mike if he was long for this world.

Mike: He’s lonely, obviously.

On Saturday, I had to be at the softball fields all day to help run player evaluations. Mike had a pretty long to-do list with the kids, and I figured we’d all get home around the same time. Then I got a text from him.

Friggin’ Mike.

The kids are very happy, though. That’s what I keep telling myself at least.

Friggin’ Goldy.