Over the weekend I was walking through my fabric store, something I do at least once or twice a week. At the front of the store, all the college stuff was in a big pile on major clearance, its old display location filled with fall decorations. The aisle behind that had Halloween decorations, which…a little early, but fine. However, the aisle after that one?


CHRISTMAS! CHRISTMAS DECORATIONS IN AUGUST! CHRISTMAS DECORATIONS A FULL FOUR MONTHS BEFORE CHRISTMAS! I mean, our local schools don’t even start until tomorrow, and Annabel doesn’t start until the following week. But Christmas decorations are out!

This makes me bonkers. Last year I went shopping for Halloween stuff and I remember employees were already consolidating the Halloween merchandise to make room for the Christmas stuff, but that was two days before Halloween. Two months before Halloween and Christmas stuff is already out! This is just insanity.

Of course, Annabel saw the Christmas stuff and was like, “OHMYGOSH CHRISSSSSSTMASSSSS! I can’t wait to see Santa and lights and open presents!” I said, “Slow your roll, Christmas is four months away.” I then ticked off all the things before then…school starting…Labor Day…Halloween…Thanksgiving….and she said, “But I see the Santa dolls now.” AAAAARGH!

I have some friends who would play Christmas music year-round if they could (and I’m pretty sure they do when they’re alone in their cars), and even they are thrown by the early Christmas stuff. My friend Catherine, Christmas Lover Extraordinaire, sent me a picture of her girls in front of a light-up snowman at Costco with the message “It’s August!” Even the Christmas fans are rebelling!

In our house we have this crazy thing called a calendar, and we actually follow it! We have Back to School stuff up now, Halloween decorations go up October 1st, Thanksgiving decorations go up November 1st. Christmas decorations, Christmas music, and Christmas spirit can come out the day after Thanksgiving. According to retailers, I am some kind of holiday freak show.

Why do we have to rush things? I know retailers are always trying to make a buck but it’s not like there aren’t a bunch of other extremely popular holidays coming up in the next few months. Why can’t I decorate for the fall without thinking, “Crap, if I don’t buy that waving Santa Claus now it will be sold out before I’m ready to buy it in two-and-a-half months?”

Having Christmas stuff out for a full third of the year sucks the joy out of not only Christmas, but all the other holidays before it. I refuse to follow this tyrannical retail calendar! I will celebrate holidays in the proper order and then, come November 28th, I will throw so much Christmas stuff up in my house it will look like Christmas exploded.

At this rate by the time my kids are teenagers, Christmas will be celebrated 365 days a year. Except in my house!