Last week, I went to the funeral of my friend Brianne’s dear grandmother. B’s grandma was one of those legendary grannies who seem fictitious in the retelling. Brianne and her two sisters spoke during the service, telling the crowd about how loving, supportive, and kind their grandmother was, and how deeply they were going to miss her. The service was wonderful, a sad but beautifully fitting tribute to a woman who touched so many lives.
I’d told myself I wasn’t going to cry during the funeral, but of course I started crying the second I sat down in the pew. I hated seeing my friend hurting, and of course, I was thinking about my own losses and the mortality of those I love.
At one point in the service, Brianne’s mom spoke about how B’s grandparents were always there – they literally never missed a single game, recital, or special event in their granddaughters’ lives. My own beloved Gramma was like this for me and my brother – she went to every softball game, cross-country match, recital, debate, you name it. We always knew we had her support. It was only after she was gone that I truly appreciated what her constant presence had meant to my confidence and emotional development. I was so lucky.
And now, my kids are so lucky. My parents have gone to all of Annabel’s recitals, school singalongs, special teas, you name it. It’s harder for Mike’s parents because they live farther away, but they still make it down here for every birthday, graduation, and special event. I am so appreciative when these four people are always there for my kids.
My Grandma played a huge part in the person I am today, and I am so glad my own children will be partially molded by their four grandparents. I love how much my kids adore them. I love that my kids can always count on them. I tell Annabel and James every day to appreciate and love their grandparents, and never, ever take them for granted. I know I don’t.
I adore grandparents! Watching my mom be a grandma to my son is amazing and I guess I see how my own grandma was like with us. She adores us and spoiled us. But, not only did that woman shape me into the person I am today but it’s also why I’m fat (still). Thanks, Grandma!
I never really knew my grandparents and I wanted my kids to know theirs.
One of our standard Christmas gifts is a “grandma day” with our two daughters. The first year I did this I bought a snowman tin that had three parts to its body. In the bottom tin was a GC for pedicures, middle tin was a lunch GC, and the top tin had a movie GC.
This year we are taking them to dinner and then to one of those escape room activities.
Ugh, right in the feels. My grandmother who lived a mile away from most of my life died in August 2009. When I got married in 2003 we started looking at homes to buy and I picked the one that was just a few blocks from her. She was always there for us (grandpa too of course until his death in 1997). My parents and in-laws have carried on the traditions set forth by there parents, very much hands on. We were blessed that my Mom took a year off work to stay home when our daughter was born in 2004 and then my mother-in-law cared for her for 2 years. They are always available to attend events. *puffy hearts*
My grandma essentially raised us (two working parents), and even when my mother stopped working, we still saw her almost every day. When I left Europe to go to college in the US, she is the one I talked to the most. I still miss her and talk about her to my kids! If I am blessed to live long enough to have grandkids, I will do my best to be there for them. Unfortunately, my kids’ grandparents on both sides are much less involved…so sad.
So very sorry for the loss of this young lady’s grandmother. Having just lost my husband 5 days before Christmas, I want to tell you that your presence and your tears meant more to your friend than you could know (I know it did for me at my husband’s service). Your message to your children and to this blog about the importance of appreciating people every day is so vital, because nobody knows how many days he/she has left. Thank you for sharing. My thoughts and prayers are with your friend and her family.
Oh my gosh Jerilynn, I am so sorry to hear about your husband. My heart goes out to you – please let me know if I can do anything to help. xoxo
Thank you so much, Heather. We are positively devastated. Thank you so much for your support. It means so much. Your blog is always a comforting place to go for me. Hugs back!
Agreed. I lost all of my grandparents by the time I was six. My children will probably not fare much better than myself (in our case, the distance factor is way more complex than for Mike’s parents). It’s the sort of social capital that in hindsight you really miss with the waning of extended family systems (my parents both have wonderful anecdotes about their grandparents that I could only marvel about, as a kid).