Comments on: Worry Spohr-t

By: Kristin

Kristin — Fri, 17 Jul 2009 19:59:53 +0000

I was never a worrier until I had a child. I was never a worrier until I became a mother. I never had a sense of mortality until the day my son was born. Now I cant pull out of the driveway without my seatbelt on. I cringe every single time my husband throws are little, laughing baby boy into the air. There is no scarier realization then the realization that there are so many things out of our control. If only there was enough bubble wrap to secure all of our loved ones for life…

Your daughter was such a beautiful girl. My heart aches for you and your wife.

By: Madge

Madge — Wed, 08 Jul 2009 15:00:10 +0000

I wish you could have that minute too. hugs to both of you.

By: sam {temptingmama}

sam {temptingmama} — Tue, 07 Jul 2009 12:00:37 +0000

Thinking of you! xoxox .-= sam {temptingmama}´s last blog ..The day I spewed my heirarchy of suffering* all over the internet =-.

By: Lisa

Lisa — Sat, 04 Jul 2009 04:42:09 +0000

Your words even are so beautiful written… its exactly how I have felt since the day my son Matthias was born, constantly a worry worte. I lost my first born son a few hours after his birth and I feel your pain. I read your blog and your wifes and pray for you often!

Blessings to you both
Lisa
.-= Lisa´s last blog ..The poops =-.

By: Krissa

Krissa — Fri, 03 Jul 2009 18:34:45 +0000

Another of yours and Heather’s loyal readers here. Just stopping back by to comment on this post again again, because I am thinking of you guys every single day. (((Hugs)))

By: Christy

Christy — Mon, 29 Jun 2009 03:12:44 +0000

I think in my case, my worrying so much is my attempt to control things, and like you said, there are so many things we have no control over…maybe the worrying makes us feel a little less helpless somehow. I like to think that if love completely and resist the urge to hide some part of ourselves to stay safe, our lives are richer for it. But then there’s those times when putting yourself out there completely ends up hurting like you can’t believe. But I think (and I hope) it’s all worth it in the end.

Blessings, Love, and Light, Mike
.-= Christy´s last blog ..Details In The Fabric =-.

By: Karin Hanson

Karin Hanson — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 16:54:16 +0000

In a lot of ways, I think being that kind of worrier it probably means you love very, very deeply and have always been all too aware of the fragility of life. These are wonderful and sweet (and yes, horrendously scary) gifts. It almost feels like bad things should never happen to the “Loving Worrier”…it feels like “the dues are paid” by being vigilant and protective and loving full out.

I think that is why, from the moment we all knew of Maddie’s passing, there was just this feeling of being hit by the “wrongness” and “unfairness” of it. I do feel she is in a wonderful place with God, and is happy and content. But because she was such a sweet and wonderful presence, it broke our hearts to have you lose her… and because you and Heather were such loving parents (and worriers), it cracked them even more.

I’m so sorry for all that has happened, I truly wish that all of us “out here” could take on a piece of your grief and you would be free to only remember the joy.

And I don’t know if it helps, but I do know one thing for sure… Maddie was absolutely aware on every level, that her Daddy was watching out for her and loving her. What a wonderful blessing for her! She got to feel safe and loved and free and happy. That is one of your gifts to her. A huge one! Maybe it is even the whole “why” of you being born a worrier.

By: Krissa

Krissa — Mon, 22 Jun 2009 20:43:21 +0000

I left a comment on Heather’s blog on the Father’s Day post, but just wanted to write here too, that I thought about you guys a lot today and yesterday. And I wished so much for Maddie to have had more time with you guys. And I wished for you guys that she were still here. … I don’t pray every day, but I have prayed for you all. And I will pray tonight that your love for each other, the three of you, will wrap you up and hold you tight and give you moments of peace. I know it will never be easy and I know nothing will make it right that she is gone, but I also know that the love you all share is greater than the boundaries of this earth. … (((Hugs))) and love to you all.

By: Barbara Howard

Barbara Howard — Mon, 22 Jun 2009 13:18:52 +0000

I worried for a while when my first son was born, until I realized that every moment I spent worrying was a moment preoccupied from loving him, and I gave it up. When my second son was born, I read the quote to the effect that “becoming a parent is consenting to let your heart walk around outside your body” for the rest of your life. And it is. And so I let it go.

There is a very trite saying that also applies to parenting, out there for a long time now, to the effect of “work like you don’t need the monmey, dance like no one is watching…love like you’ve never been hurt.” The first time I read it years ago, I was struck by its audacity…and by how difficult it sometimes can be to actally do that…but I do it. After losing my father at the age of 8 (the oldest of 5 kids, my youngest sister was Maddie’s age when he was killed), I can tell you that I am who I am today, 51 years later, because he loved me like that, and I him.

Go ahead and worry. It can be a good thing…it protects Rigby. Just know that your control is limited, and you must allow yourself room to fully participate in life and in love, Mike. I know you did with Maddie. That’s why it hurts you so. And why it is so precious.

By: Chrissie

Chrissie — Mon, 22 Jun 2009 05:30:46 +0000

Happy Fathers Day Mike. Hugs to you and Heather.