Being a stay at home parent IS a job.
This is something women have been saying for years, and they are totally correct. You are on the job twenty-four hours a day, have a number of people under your command, and must be able to leap to duty at a second’s notice. Despite this, the position gets little respect. It’s sort of like being a teacher (something I know about). You work your ass off but most people look down on you and think you should get a real job. Bastards.
Anyhoo…
The more I think about it being a parent is a lot like a career at a large company, and you, of course, start with an entry level position (note: yes, I realize I could make a crass sex joke here but thought better of it…but apparantly you didn’t, sickos). At this company there are promotions, benefits, and even retirement.
Let me explain:
When you first are hired your duties are menial and don’t involve a lot of thought. Cleaning diapers, putting bottles together, giving feedings, this is your typical minimum wage entry level position. The hours are bad too – pretty much every night you get called to work at two, three, four in the morning – and the one person below you doesn’t listen to a word you say. Heck, they don’t even speak English, which, in California, is about right in these kind of jobs.
Soon things get better. The person below you becomes more articulate, and before long one or two more people come under your command. You’re moving up in the world! Your hours improve too as your babies now sleep through the night. But the job is still not so great though as you’re still cleaning diapers, doing laundry, and cooking meals. You’re enjoying it more though, and really starting to dig your co-workers.
Eventually you become a manager. You do little physical labor, and pretty much just over see your kids as they go to school, do after school activities, and hang out with their friends. The job is much more intellectually demanding though. The “Why is the sky blue?” type questions are a thing of the past and replaced by, “My boyfriend wants to have sex and I think I should do it because I really love him should I?” With questions like that you better come up with the right answer and fast!
Finally, your kids leave the home and you now are just a consultant. A call comes now and then, as does a visit, but for the most part the company doesn’t need you anymore. If you did your job right though, you can rest easy knowing you’ve set your underlings up to be successful on their own.
So yeah…being a stay at home parent IS a job, and don’t let anyone tell you any different. And…the best part is that when you get a kiss from a co-worker it warms your heart instead of sending you down to HR to lodge a sexual harrassment complaint!
I like my job. It may not impress people at parties, but it’s pretty cool to be this person’s boss…
Solar Dancer says:
Thank you for summing it up so nicely. Being a stay at home mom is the best job in the entire world – but it is also the hardest (and I’ve taught middle school math). I wish there was some way to get all this across to people when they ask what I do.
Ms. Moon says:
Only one thing wrong with that post- I think you’re confused as to who the boss of this operation is. I believe it’s the girl in the picture.
Ms. Moons last blog post..A Short Little Thought
Anna Marie says:
Thank you Mike! That’s how I’m going to word this position on my resume in case I ever start looking for a second job!
And Ms. Moon has a point – my kids definitely are the boss of me. I like to think of them as benevolent dictators.
Anna Maries last blog post..Phone photo of the Day
Kristin says:
Yep. I’m certainly not the boss, even though I try to be. I was a lawyer in my past life, and this is hands-down the hardest thing I’ve ever done. There are NO vacations, no mental health days, no breaks. Going out for a cup of coffee requires loading the van with all 4 kids. I just make it at home now.
And now I must go drag the twins off the couch. See, it never ends.
Kristins last blog post..Something to talk about
Gin says:
Yup, I agree with you! Being a SAHP is definitely the worst paying BEST JOB ever. The most rewarding in any field!!
Gins last blog post..What looms ahead
Gin says:
And when I say worst paying, I’m saying $$$$. I HAVE TO CLARIFY THIS!!!!!!!!!!!
Gins last blog post..What looms ahead
ali says:
this would impress me at a party.
just saying
alis last blog post..the best laid plans. the garage abyss. the nudeys.
Susie says:
My mother has been saying this all these years. It’s the most underpaid and under-appreciated job in the world. And the shifts are 24 hours long, 7 days a week! That said, I don’t think there is a job where you get to say: “Look at that little person…I’ve raised them!”
(Also, is Maddie turning out to be a ginger? Because that’s adorable.)
Susies last blog post..My Wild Adventures: The College Series
VegasDad says:
Great job description. Personally I’m not a stay at home parent and I probably would never be able to do it. I’m not skilled enought. I respect anyone, mom or dad, that takes on that important responsibility. It is probably the most important job of all.
VegasDads last blog post..saving my money
Daddy Dan says:
Great analogy, Mike.
The base pay for a stay-at-home parent may suck, but the fringe benefits you receive are worth all the hard work.
HeatherPride says:
Sing it sister! Uh, I mean……RIGHT ON, BRO!
HeatherPrides last blog post..Losing Laurel
Surfer Jay says:
As CEO’s go, they get paid bank to deal with the stress of handling a large company with a lot of people. So as you mention about having multiple ankle bighters running around, when does the increase in payment arrive? Is the payment merely the joys of seeing their faces while explainging why the sky is blue, or do we get an extra petty cash credit card to spend on our boy toys? On the contrary, I forsee our extra cash dwindling away as we have more kids….
Great post. I concur. I have a nine week old, and it cretainly is a fulltime job! I can’t get anything done. Perhaps a couple hours a day while The Boy is sleeping, or in a good mood right after he eats I can run through the house to tackled a couple projects. But forget about spare time….
Dana says:
This analogy is totally awesome! Way to go! Linky love!
Kia (Good Enough Mama) says:
I SO wish I were boss. However, it’s abundantly obvious that I’m not. Not even a rung or two down on the ladder of employment. I can often be heard telling my son that I’m not his slave or his maid, but if I’m honest with myself, I’m just that: a slave and a maid. I’m not very good at either job, but the CEO in this operation can’t be picky as no one else applied for the job.
Joking aside, I love my job, and especially my boss.
Kia (Good Enough Mama)s last blog post..Morphing into More?
LiteralDan says:
Since you mentioned it, I have found the HR department at my workplace very unresponsive. The most helpful interaction I’ve had involved a sippy cup of juice in the face.
LiteralDans last blog post..The Unbearable Weightiness of Morning
A Free Man says:
I like your analogy, but I think you’ve got the chain of command wrong. As far as I can tell so far – they’re the boss.
A Free Mans last blog post..Oh, crap…
Sleep Deprivation Ninja says:
Well put.
Oddly, all the companies I’ve worked at have never had HR departments. You get away with murder
Sleep Deprivation Ninjas last blog post..100 Word Challenge: Pillar
sam (temptingmama) says:
When I left work to start my maternity leave just before having Hudson I can’t tell you how many people said to me “have a nice time off” like I was going on vacation!! Idiots.
Sometimes I’d rather be in the office – it’s easier!
Headless Mom says:
Yea for us ‘SAH-Parents”!
Megan says:
perfect.
Marinka says:
Ok, so is this “dad, my boyfriend wants to have sex with me, should I?” thing new? Because when I was a teenager it was more along the lines of “please don’t talk to me in public so that no one will suspect we’re related.”
Marinka says:
Ok, so is this “dad, my boyfriend wants to have sex with me, should I?” thing new? Because when I was a teenager it was more along the lines of “please don’t talk to me in public so that no one will suspect we’re related.”
Marinkas last blog post..Saturday Tidbits