After winning the hard fought battle to get Annie to sleep in her own room, we had a regression not too long ago. Annie, about ten minutes after being put down, suddenly started to call out, “Dadda? Dadda?” I turned to Heather with my heart breaking and asked if I should check on Annie, but she said it would be best to give it a minute to see if she’d fall back to sleep.
I nodded and stayed put until Annie yelled, “Dadda?! Annie scared!!” Before Heather could even open her mouth I had already teleported into Annie’s room. Upon seeing me Annie immediately raised her hands into the air and begged, “Uppa?! UPPA?!”
“No uppa,” I said firmly. “But Dadda will sit in the chair, okay?”
Annie calmed a little. “Dadda sit?”
“Yes,” I replied. “Dadda sit.”
I sat in the rocking chair next to her crib and Annie quickly fell asleep. From that night on “Dadda sit” became a required part of our nightly routine, and the minute we tell her it’s time for bed she asks, “DADDA SIT?! DADDA SIT?!” until I say, “Of course, Silly. Dadda sit.”
I don’t mind doing this – especially since she’s usually asleep in minutes – but last night something was OFF with the kid. She was super hyper, and instead of going to sleep, she popped up on the side of the crib next to the chair. Like this:
Guess who isn’t sleepy, Daddy!
She then started chatting. NON-STOP. FOR AN HOUR. Some excerpts:
8:36 p.m.
Annie: “One! Two! Three! Four! Five! Seven! Nine! Ten! One! Two! Three…”
8:44 p.m.
Annie (singing): “Twinkle twinkle little star how I wonder where’s your car.”
8:51 p.m.
Annie introduced me to every item in her crib.
“Dadda, this is Foofa. Dadda, this is baby Molly. Dadda, this is blanket. Dadda, this is Elmo…”
There were easily another twenty items in there. It was comically endless – like watching clowns coming out of clown car.
8:58 p.m.
Annie discussed one of her favorite films, “Beauty and the Beast.”
“Dadda? Uh… Princess Belle…. And the lion…. And the Grampa…. And the coffee…”
Note: “The Lion” is The Beast, “The Grampa” is Belle’s father, and – my favorite – “the coffee” is the Chip the tea cup.
9:05 p.m.
Annie jumped on her mattress. I told her to lay down. She laughed and jumped some more. Repeat.
9:11 p.m.
Having had enough, I decided to leave even though crazy Annie was still awake. I put on my glasses (I always take them off when I sit in the chair) and she freaked out:
“OFF GLASSES!!! DADA!!! OFF GLASSES! WHAAA!!! OFF GLASSES!!!”
I took off my glasses and grudgingly leaned back. Annie laid back down. A couple minutes of silence passed. “Could she be asleep?”
And then:
“Rapunzel! Long hair!”
9:18 p.m.
Me (losing it): “Annie! This is ridiculous! Lay down and close your eyes!”
Annie (imitating, to her doll): “Molly! Lay down! Close eyes! CLOSE EYES!! OH NO!! CLOSE EYES!!”
Me: “What’s wrong?”
Annie pointed to her doll and its painted eyes. “Dada! Eyes no close!”
Me: “Annie, it is a doll. The eyes don’t close.”
Annie: “WAAAAAHHH!!!!”
9:23 p.m
Frustrated and bored, I turned on my phone and looked at Twitter. Two seconds later this appeared:
Whatcha doin’?”
Annie: “Pishures? Annie see pishures?”
9:31 p.m.
Zzzzzzzzz. Merciful, merciful zzzzzzs.
Sarah G says:
Dude, she has you played. You might find the following phrase useful, “Honey, I’ll stay as long as you’re trying to go to sleep. If you play I’ll leave.” It worked wonders for us!
Amy Collen says:
Yeah, I agree, she does have you played. However, it is still so neat to read these cute posts. When she grows up and hears/reads these stories about things like this she is just going to love you that much more. There is nothing like a daughter’s relationship with her dad :).
Now, as for the current situation :). If you want to get some sleep you need to tell her it is time for bed and walk out. Maybe have a routine with a story first. Yes, she will cry her eyes out at first. Gradually though she will understand that bedtime is bedtime. I always leave a bunch of toys in with my son. He happily played with them in his crib and now in his big boy bed. When he falls asleep I just creep in and remove everything (so he doesn’t roll over on anything. LOL!). Don’t worry, Mike. She knows that you and Heather adore her :). Don’t feel guilty about this. She needs to learn how to fall asleep on her own now. She is old enough. You guys will get there and it will be okay! I promise you!
Cam says:
Best thing to start the day with.
karen says:
played!
Jenn says:
BUSTED!!! Hate to say this, but unless she is uber tired tonight….get ready for round 2!!! If you do decide to do the tough love thing to get her back on track, remember her behaviour is going to get worse BEFORE it gets better AND, because “Annie Scared” brought you into her room in the first place, she will use that again. Have you ever watched Super Nanny? She has a strategy that might work for this situstion. Stay stronger Dada….YOU CAN DO THIS and when you do…you’ll be sooo proud of yourself….and so will we!!! Good Luck Mike!!
Mary says:
The only way it will end is with a couple of nights of screaming for Dadda. Good luck and stay strong. You started the pattern – break it now or you will be sitting with her for the forseeable future and there goes your alone time with Heather. We’ve all been there – you can do it.
Shannon says:
Giggle…It’s so hard to be firm with them and hold your ground when they are hilarious like this. I know it hurts them in the long run..but man they are so darned cute!
Laura says:
We live in a city rowhome, in a small area with a good neighborhood feel. We know most of our neighbors, but knew fewer of the people on the next street over, whose homes back to the back of our house and are separated by an alley. When it’s nice out, our windows are open. Sometimes my daughter will scream bloody murder at bedtime, and when the windows are open (we open the top panes in her room so she can’t fall out), I cringe every 3.5 seconds. I’m surprised the police haven’t shown up yet.
Lindsey says:
Hilarious!! Especially liked the — pause, Rapunzel, long hair bit!!! I remember well those days – feel like you are going to crawl out of your skin, waiting for the zzzzz’s to hit! I was a pushover like you for yrs, with all my kids — sitting in the hallway, lying in the beds with them, etc. Love is sometimes spelled “STUPID” and “PUSHOVER” and ”SUCKER” but so hard to hear them cry!!! Mine are all grown and out of the house but I so well remember my love, frustration and angst at times like those. Annie knows who the softie is in your family. So glad she has such a great daddy.
But I agree, gotta be firm. Annie knows what she is doing!!
Pattie says:
Too funny. And I love her reimagined lyrics to “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star.”
Tammy M. says:
Frustrating as it might get, I bet this “Dadda Sit” time is going to be a favorite memory of yours. Especially when she’s a teen and is out in her car in the evening and you’re wishing she was home in bed. (I have a 17 year old daughter. Can you tell?)
Megan says:
Haaaa! Reminds me so much of my 21 month old. She woke up at 4 am the other night shouting, “Swings! WEEEEEE!!!” (She also has the same jammies as Annie. I feel like they could be bffs 4 lyfe.)
That last picture…omg. JUST GIVE HER WHAT SHE WANTS, MIKE!
Emma says:
What an incredibly spoiled child.
Heather says:
Yep. Our oldest daughter died. We are quicker to jump, faster to bend, easier to break now. If sitting with our daughter at night makes her spoiled, then we are spoiled, too. I wish I had sat with Maddie more.
Amy Collen says:
What an incredibly rude woman.
Michell DuBose says:
Can you block that rude bi***? Don’t freak on the bedtime thing. By the time she goes to college she will probably sleep in her bed all night. Still miss the girl coming to our room in the middle of the night, which she did until she was about 12. Even now when she comes home to visit, at the great age of 22, she comes in and lays with us some mornings. Go give that baby some kisses now.
Noelle says:
The best advice I ever got about child-rearing was “you can never love a child too much.” If dadda sitting with Annie makes her feel loved and safe that’s exactly what you should do. YOur family, your business!
Becca_Masters says:
wow. judgemental much?
Britt W says:
What the what?!?!?! When is it EVER ok to judge someone’s child like that? Especially a strangers child, when you don’t know backstory (but seriously how easy is it to just look around here a little)
Whatever, Mike this was HILARIOUS, We’ve been dealing with this from our 2 1/2 yr old some too. He is just so funny, and it’s hard to get mad or frustrated (at least the first half hour haha) We use my old alarm clock that has a sleep machine on it and that seems to do the trick now. His favorite is the radio (Music, Mama?) and “Waterfall!” (ocean sound)
Ya’ll are doing a great job, and staying in the moment with your precious girl. Keep it up.
Maggie says:
Wow. I guess my kid was SUPER spoiled. He slept with me till he was 9. I am assuming Emma has no children, or they are emotionless robots.
Lisa W. says:
Emma.. Sorry.. But you sound like an immature child! I really hope you don’t have children and if you do, that you don’t teach them to be bullies like you! I’m thinking instead of Annie being “spoiled”.. I think she is “LOVED”!
Trisha says:
With a face as sweet as that who could blame you for falling for it all; hook, line and sinker. Well played Annie, well played!
My little one goes through occasional boughts of mind racing just before bed and then boom, she’s out like a light. It’s comical and a wee bit frightening all at once.
She’ll find her way back to her bedtime stride sooner or later, no worries Mike!
Sunday says:
You are so screwed! I did this with my son when he was 18 months, but instead of sitting in a chair, it was “hold my hand”. It was so cute and it only took a minute for him to fall asleep….at first. It soon escalated to holding his hand for 15 minutes and hissing “go to sleep” whenever he’d start talking or moving. Now he’s nine and he still wants me to hold his hand when he’s ready to fall asleep. We’ve compromised now, I read to him for a couple minutes, then he read to himself for a while. Occasionally, he’ll come get me and say, “I’m ready to go to sleep now” and I have to go hold his hand for another minute.
You have to be firm now. “I’ll sit for a couple minutes, then Dadda has to go.” If she fusses, you say “I’ll come check on you in a little bit”. Good luck!
Melli says:
Sweet story
Marypat says:
Wow “Emma”. Just…wow.
Laura says:
I helped my single Mom sister raise my now 19 yr old nephew and he REFUSED to go to sleep for a nap or at night unless you first sat next to him when he was in his crib, and then when he moved to a bed, lay down in the bed with him til he fell asleep. We indulged this as we felt guilty for a lack of a Dad in his life and what the hell, it was 15 minutes out of our lives and I love a good snuggle. Nap time I usually fell asleep with him. This lasted til he was close to 6 or 7. As I said he’s 19 now and just about the greatest kid in the world, kind, compassionate, smart, funny with a giant heart and a dazzling smile. Some might call it an indulgence, we felt it was what he needed. He turned out pretty good
Laura says:
I agree with the comments that Annie may have been playing you and I agree that you may be in for round two and some later nights than you would necessarily prefer. However, I completely get jumping more quickly and bending. Spending some extra time with your child when he/she is little is not spoiling your child. It is creating memories for both the parent and the child. We choose to embrace this time and now that our son is older it is when he tells us what went on in his day, particularly great moments, things that are concerning him. I wouldn’t trade this time of day for anything and I know these moments are ones that will make a positive difference for our children because it is one more way we demonstrate our love and demonstrate that we are there for them and will always listen.
Emma, you are entitled to your opinion but I see NO need to be hurtful. Shouldn’t we all cherish the time we have with loved ones?
Laura says:
UGH just read Emma’s comment. Trolls are everywhere, ignore them.
Lisa says:
I think the main question/answer is if this is causing a problem for Mom or Dad? If not, then why stop? I don’t know of any evidence anywhere that points to problems down the road when you sit up/hold hands/lay next to/whatever at night with your 2 year old! NOW if this is causing a problem between you & Heather such as you get no alone time, etc. well then you definitely need to tweak it a bit. Remember taking care of Annie’s parents are the most important thing you can do for her! They are only little for such a short time!
BTW, my daughter is only 1 month younger than Annie and I can soooo relate to most of your posts! They are smart little creatures, that’s for sure!
Jen says:
hehe I was just trying to imagine a Disney movie where a beautiful lady falls for a lion, saves her grampa and befriends a cup of coffee.
Thanks Annie for making me laugh.
Sue says:
Sorry, Mike, that was hilarious to read, but I know it wasn’t as fun for you! Also; I pretty much dislike Emma’s comment, too, and Heather, your reply to her gave me chills, and was absolutely beautifully said.
Becca_Masters says:
I think that although Annie probably is playing you Mike, it’s not a big deal. eventually she will grow out of it.
I did.
when I was 13……
When I was a baby, my mom could NOT get me to go to sleep EVER. one day she put the radio on and after a few minutes of “quiet time” i fell asleep. ever since then, it was Becca’s bedtime, drink of water, bathroom, tuck in to bed, short story, radio on, night light on and big lights out. Within 5 minutes I would be asleep.
Until I was 13 I couldn’t go to sleep unless I had some sort of music playing quietly. Eventually I didn’t need it anymore.
Eventually Annie won’t need Dada to sit by her for a while before sleepy time.
besides, it’s a wonderful time to spend with your child, and as a parent, you just need to work out what works best for getting your child to sleep. my mom used to prepare me before the radio by weaving a dream about the land of Nod. We made up characters, there were faeries and gnomes and sprites and it was a magical world that only existed in my dreams. the radio went on and I went off to Nod.
Stacy says:
I laid down with my two boys every night for bed until about 6 months ago, it was nice to have cuddle time and a few moments to talk every night. I stopped because they got in the routine of waking up in the middle of the night and either wanting me to go lay back down with them or wanting to get in my bed, sometimes waking up multiple times a night. I had to put my foot down and make them go to sleep on their own, and when we finally got that down they started sleeping better and it is rare that one of them wakes up at night these days. Good luck in whatever you choose to do, be it sitting every night with her or trying to get her back to a by herself routine. Either way, she will be fine
Sandra says:
Omg… i have tears streaming down my face from laughing so hard, because the exact same thing happens in our house with our little 2 (almost 3) year old, and her daddy! Although he has to lay down on the floor beside the bed to get her to sleep. Quite often, I end up going into the room to wake him up when I hear him snoring over the monitor.
Love this blog- you two are truly amazing people, and parents!
Bobbi says:
oh the joys of toddler hood.
Glenda says:
i did the same thing with my daughter and as she got older and slept in her bed, she’d get up in the middle of the night and knock on our bedroom door. i’m scared… i can’t sleep… oh the joys
vcoffland says:
We used to have a similar situation when ours was about the same age as Annie and resolved it by setting a time limit on how long Mama would be staying. In this case it was five minutes as timed music played by her Leapfrog Tad (similar to Violet or Scout). She didn’t always like it when time was up but we stood firm and eventually she realized that was the routine to expect. A year later, we still do our five minutes of music together after books and it’s a great way to wind down the day for us too! Just a suggestion of something to try before she expects you to stay until she goes to sleep–obviously she would enjoy an all nighter given the chance. Good luck!
Snarky Mommy says:
My 27-month-old is going through the WORST sleep regression right now. I have to go back in four or five times after putting her down because she’s screaming bloody murder. She’s also waking up in the middle of the night screaming and waking for the day around 6. These are special, special times.
Margaret says:
Bwahahahaha! This is our house at naptimes, only the phrase is “Mommy wie down?” so that I lie down with him. IN HIS TODDLER BED. It is ridiculous, but at the time it makes perfect sense, right? Crazy kids.
Sabrina says:
Been there with both my girls. They’re only this young once & dada sit won’t last forever (I kinda miss the mama sit requests now that I have big kids). She knows she’s loved, so spoil away :). Both of mine are great sleepers now, so I consider it time well spent. It’s all about whatever works & every family is different.
Rita from the Chicago says:
This is too funny of a post! We’re dealing with something similar with our 18 month old. Except it’s when he wakes up the middle of the night. He will scream as if he’s in the worst pain ever, and as soon as either my husband or I open the door, he says “Hi!” in the cutest voice ever! Two night ago we had to lay down the law and let him cry…it sucked. Thankfully last night he didn’t wake up at all…we’ll see how it goes from here!
Good luck not having to Sit, Dadda!
TonyaM says:
I will never hear Twinkle Twinkle again without thinking of the car! Lol! I’m pretty much a hard ass mom, but the nighttime drama always got to me. Maybe it was because I remember being so scared at night. Maybe it’s because even now, I prefer falling asleep to a tv. But either way, I’ve
been getting kids to sleep in one way or another for over 11 years. My oldest is fine, of course, but my youngest, who’s 7, still prefers a back rub to go to sleep. And I don’t mind a bit.
Stacy says:
I also indulged my kids a lot at night because I hated night time as a child. I slept in my moms floor a good portion of my childhood. I did outgrow it so I am proof it doesn’t last forever
MichelleM says:
I have a 2 1/2 year old daughter and I can definitely say it’s easy to give in to what they want because they are SO CUTE!! And it’s hard to get mad at them! I love the random conversations and sweet, innocent curiousity. I cherish this age so much and I’ll be really sad when it’s over. I would probably stop sitting with her like that soon or you will find yourself in there every night! But if she is that funny and cute, that wouldn’t be so bad?!? The idea above of playing something with music and saying you will leave when it’s over is good!
Jana says:
You are such a good dad!!! You will be happy you did this later… even though it sucks right now!
Tara says:
She is so adorable! Those pictures are just precious. It seems like she just enjoys visiting rather than that she’s afraid to sleep on her own. My little guy is like that too. He loves to sleep but if I’m in his room, he’ll talk to me until I leave.
Lisa Ash says:
Oh man, so sweet! At the time, I know it can be maddening. We recently realized our toddler (just a bit older than Annie) will act like a mad tweaker when he’s had anything w/ red food dye in it. Whoa – it’s in a *lot* of things!
Christine Hendricks says:
Hilarous, Mike absolutely hilarious and oh can I relate though must say with considerable less humour. Thanks for the laugh!
Shana in Texas says:
Too cute! I particularly love how kids interpret songs. It was just in the past two months have we succeeded in getting our 7 and 3 year old to fall asleep alone in their own beds. That was mostly our fault because I love lying next to my kiddos and enjoyed co-sleeping when they were babies. They can do it but will fight as much as possible until it becomes routine. I mean, who wouldn’t want an audience / friend to talk to?
Paula says:
I was thinking about your post today and asked my dad how was our sleep routine when I was around Annie’s age. It turns out I acted like her, but wanted both mom AND dad in the room. Not only it didn’t cause me any problems, but he seemed to actually miss that, and it was a great conversation between us.
Oh, and by the way, I had no problems with sleep-overs or travelling without my parents when I was older.
Wallydraigle says:
Oh, TWO. Our Sleeper Formerly Known As Champion has been doing this for the last month… with no one in her room. Our other child did it, too. I console myself that it’s all because of verbal development, so it’s a GOOD thing. It’s also freaking hilarious, even if it does mean grouchy child in the morning.
Annalisa says:
That’s my one fear, that when my daughter learns more words she’ll find more ways to avoid going to sleep. She still wakes up once or twice a night at 16 months, and the only thing that gets her back to sleep is nursing (other than at night, she’s essentially weaned). She already knows we’ll run if she cries, imagine what she will do once she figures out the power of words.