Yes, I did hear that Duchess Catherine is pregnant and has hyperemesis gravidarum! And yes, that is the same thing I have! I think everyone I know (kindly) texted me the royal news today. I wrote a silly little advice post to the princess about how to deal with HG, but don’t let my light tone fool you, I feel absolutely terrible for her. HG is really awful and I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy – even Lee Corso. I’ve been asked lots of questions about my HG diagnosis since I mentioned it after first needing IV fluids a few weeks ago, but with the announcement that Her Royal Highness is also an HG sufferer, I figured this would be a good time to address them.
Were you this sick with your previous pregnancies? Yes. I look back on Madeline’s pregnancy and it’s very obvious that I was suffering from HG. I was sick the whole time. I could barely eat. But, there were so many other horrible things wrong during that pregnancy that the HG was ignored by everyone – including me. And I really didn’t know that how I was feeling wasn’t normal. I saw tons of specialists but none of them regularly enough to notice I was sick. My regular OB should have noticed but that is just one of the many spectacular ways she failed us during that pregnancy. With Annabel’s pregnancy I vomited every single day, but I was also deep in the throes of grief and I slept, a lot. However, Dr. Risky and Dr. Looove were on top of me, and luckily Zofran was much more effective during that pregnancy.
How come you’ve never really mentioned having HG before? I think because I felt like I didn’t “suffer” as much as I thought was required of a woman to get an HG diagnosis. I didn’t vomit thirty times a day with my first pregnancies or lose forty pounds like a lot of the women I read about on the Helpher.org message boards. Even though I had a bunch of the other symptoms, I felt like they had it so much worse than me. And also…I was embarrassed to have another thing wrong with Annabel’s pregnancy, so even though I wrote a lot about being sick, I kept it at the simple “morning sickness.”
Do you really vomit all day? How do you get anything done? I vomit throughout the day, but I’m not an exorcist-like hose spewing constantly. I have days with large stretches that are vomit-free. I am almost constantly nauseated, but that is something I can deal with. When I’m not throwing up, I do my chores, write, play with Annie, and do anything else that comes up. I try to keep my normal life whenever I physically and mentally feel like I can.
Do you puke in public? If you mean in front of random people, I try to avoid that at all costs. When I enter a new place I immediately locate the bathrooms. I also have a barf bag on me at all times. But there have been times when I’ve thrown up in trash cans on the sidewalk, or in the sink of a public restroom, and it’s humiliating. I have been lucky that every witness has been incredibly kind. I also always clean up any mess I make.
Do you vomit in front of Annie? Is she scared/neglected/scarred for life? I have thrown up in front of her, although I obviously would prefer not to. But that girl is hot on my heels when I run for the bathroom, so I’ve just made it into an “everybody pukes!” life lesson, which actually came in kind of handy when she threw up a week and a half ago. She’s never been scared; she thinks it’s fun to run after me. After I’m sick she says, “Mama, you threw up! Can I kiss your tummy?” She also thought it was really awesome when I (out of necessity) had to throw up in her princess potty and the “You Peed In The Potty! Victory Music” played. Frankly, it was kind of awesome.
Why would you do this to yourself again? Isn’t one child enough? Because we want another child. Because I can deal with nine crappy months to get a lifetime of happiness. Because my doctors said I could, and I have insurance and a large, willing support group. There IS always the chance that HG won’t appear or be as severe in subsequent pregnancies. Mine could still even out. Mike and I decided before I got pregnant this time that this would be my last pregnancy, regardless of the outcome. HG played a role in that decision, but there were lots of other factors we considered. It’s ridiculous to think Annabel isn’t “enough.” That kid is more than enough. But if it makes me greedy or selfish (as some have said) to want one more, then fine. I’m greedy and selfish! I’m cool with that. Also, I have TWO children, even if one of them isn’t physically here.
I think this could go on forever, but these are the most common questions I get. If you have any more, leave ’em below and I’ll answer!
That sounds really unpleasant. My sister (I now realize in retrospect, although I never heard a diagnosis) had HG when she was pregnant with twin girls. She couldn’t even keep water down, let alone anything else. It was extreme. But it got a lot better as she got into the third trimester. She was walking around big as a house, but a reasonably-well-functioning house. And now those twins are thriving nine-year-olds (which in 2012 Brooklyn means they’re about 15, socially and in terms of their intense, passionate desire for iPhones).
I had HG with my first, and I totally agree with everything you said. You learn to be able to get “creative” with hiding how sick you actually are. One question for you though: did yours end as soon as Maddie and Annie were born? Mine continued for about a Month and a half after Claire was born, and unfortunately I received the Gall Stones diagnosis (started around month 8 with C) which led to my Gall Bladder removal 3 months after she was born. I always wondered if it was just the Gall Stones throughout – although, I’m 39 weeks with baby #2, and was just as sick the 2nd time around until month 5…
I feel bad for the Duchess – looking at the pictures of all the Paps outside the hospital, being forced to tell everyone (family AND the world) early, just because everyone would find out through tabloids anyway… That’s gotta not help the stress of early pregnancy.
My nausea and vomiting went away instantly with both, although it took me about six weeks to get a normal appetite back.
My mom had HG with everyone of her 6 kids. SIX. As the oldest I watched her suffer through it. I’m still not sure how she did it. Then, when I watched my sister suffer through it with all 4 of her kids, I thought for sure I was doomed.
Thankfully, while I’ve felt sick as a dog the majority of my pregnancy, zofran has worked well enough that I do not actually throw up most days. I also have managed to regain all the weight I lost at the beginning and have even put on some pounds. I am grateful for every pound and every bite of food, that’s for sure.
Every time I hear about someone suffering from HG my heart goes out to them in part because I realize just how lucky I am to have medicine that works for me, and insurance that will pay for it.
I hope you (and the duchess) get a break from it soon.
wow, SIX TIMES! Your mom is amazing.
Yeah she’s my hero. For that and a million other things of course.
I have a question! Who are these question people?! “Isn’t one child enough?” Gah! Sorry, I may be PMSimg, but how irritating you have to put up with that crap. I hope Kate Middleton is okay, she doesn’t exactly have much weight to spare and the baby will take what he/she needs. I’m sure she’s being well looked after though!
THAT was going to my question. How DARE they! My sister has really bad teenage onset pscoriactic arthritis (sic I know) and when she had twins (boy and girl) she still wanted more. BUT I had to agree with the doctor with that one. He told her not to even adopt because she is pretty much a cripple. I had to stay with her for the first year after they were born because she couldnt even pick them up. So 2 were enough in my opinion unless she wants to adopt a child that doesnt need to be picked up or put in a car seat.
THAT I agreed with, not the questions about her wanting more kids. The meds that she has to take for her disease is immune horrible, so she is sick most of the time all the time, plus the mangling of her bones and cartilage. I have to agree because I love her. I have to agree because she is going to be in a wheelchair within a few years and with her advanced diabetes (not from eating too much) she may not have a lot of life left (she isnt dying but she will die early) I do think she should be happy with my boos. But in the end, if she wants another child it’s her own damn business! I just dont want her children do be heartbroken.
Different sitch I know, and Heather I wish you SEVEN children because that’s how awesome you and Mike are such good parents.
I can’t believe you get these kind of questions! The one that irks me the most is, “isn’t one or two enough?” I received the same question from my MIL. Sometimes I’d like to say no the two I have aren’t enough. They are sub-par as far as kids go and we are still trying to get it right! Ohhhh it’s a touchy subject for me! Count me in the greedy and selfish group I guess. Hope your HG does even out. Hugs and prayers your way!
Caroline, your comment made me chuckle into my Diet Coke this morning! “They are sub-par as far as kids go and we are still trying to get it right!” That would definitely quiet them, huh?
Oh Caroline, that was hilarious!
HAHA I am totally going to say this!
Somebody actually asked why you would do it again? AND called you selfish?? What an A-hole.
Although I’ve never had HG, I did have everyday, all day nausea with all of my pregnancies. With my boys, it ended around 20 weeks, with my girls it usually lasted until 34w (with my pregnancies that ended at 35w and 37w) and 38w (with my pg that lasted 39w4d). I would do it again in a heartbeat. With the last tw0, I did vomit multiple times every day. Since HG sounds way worse, I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. And I’ll spare you my funny, yet horrifying pg puke stories.
I had HG for my two pregnancies. Luckily with my first one I was able to lay down every day. With my second pregnancy (with twins) I was miserable. My friend likes to remind me of how she called every day and my then 4 year old daughter would say “my mom can’t come to the phone right now, she’s throwing up. Can she call you later?”
Focus on the “prize” at the end!
I had HG with all 3 of my pregnancies. The last being the worst- I had to have a picc line and get nutrition through TPN. Thankfully mine ended around 17-19 weeks. It’s miserable!
I’ve never really thought about HG…but I was interested in the post..and feel like I’ve learned a thing or two. Thanks Heather for the info. I hope your pregnancy goes a smoothly as possible and can’t wait for the wonderful wonderful end result!
It’s ridiculous to think that Annabel isn’t “enough.”. That kid is more than enough.
That made me laugh out loud.
Here’s to you, and Kate, feeling much better soon…..
It’s a shame you’re so sick and have to go through each day that way. I appreciate your honesty and your positive attitude about it – I just hope you feel better sooner, rather than later!
I have a question!
Do you feel better after you vomit? Or is it just a never-ending stream of nausea?
Oh, I hope you at least feel a bit better after puking! It’s terrible when you can’t even get a little reprieve!
As for the “don’t you have enough kids?” comment….
Kick them, Heather.
If someone says that to you again, kick them in the head.
Who the hell says that???
I’m a firm believer that you can never have too many friends, children, or pets (as long as you can financially support the latter 2). Those people, those experiences with them and that love is what makes life worth living. If others don’t “get” that, then to hell with them!
And one final note….
I can’t believe the Duchess of Cambridge had to go to the hospital! So pedestrian! LOL
You’d figure they’d have some sort of in-palace doctor who could give her an IV and meds!
Ah, one final question!
Does it go away right after you have baby?
Or does it stick around for a couple days/weeks/etc. after?
Lindsey Reese says:
Madi, the Duchess didn’t go to the hospital – she went to hospital. They don’t like using “the” in England!! They don’t go to the university, either – just university. They are very stingy with their use of ‘the” in England! I’ve always found it so strange.
I have a question to add to Madi”s. When you vomit, is it all your stomach contents or just a little bit. (kind of gross question, but I’ve always wondered)
Well, my body really tries to get rid of everything, but mentally I’m constantly fighting the urge, and so it’s a battle of mind vs body to keep in/get rid of as much as possible. So sometimes I can keep a bit down. I dry heave a lot, which I almost find worse. ALMOST.
The vomiting goes away immediately, as does most of the nausea. My appetite usually takes six weeks or so to return. You basically have to relearn how to eat.
Here in the UK, IVs can only be administered in a medical environment, such as a hospital, clinic, hospice. That’s why she had to go into a hospital.
I don’t really feel better after I vomit. It’s not like when you’re sick or hungover and you know vomiting will help. It’s just never-ending nausea.
Oh, poor Heather. That plain sucks.
At least it goes away when baby arrives….but still. 40 weeks of nausea? That is just so brutal. That makes you even more fabulous that you’re willing to go through it! But I like your attitude….9 months of misery and you get a wonderful little person to love forever!
Ah, I gotcha! That makes a lot more sense. I wondered why she’d go to hospital when surely she had to know that her secret would be revealed to the world! (Still, you’d think the royals could make their own medical facility! LOL)
Jessica Makuh says:
I get terrible morning sickness when I’m pregnant. I never needed iv fluids because I was able to keep something down each pregnancy, whether it was lemonade or tea, but I did lose 10 pounds with my first and 15 with my second. Luckily, I felt much better by the 5th month and the rest of my pregnancies are sickness free. The second was harder because I had a 1 year old to take care of. I feel for you. I totally agree with you about doing it again. I would LOVE a third child, but my husband isn’t sure he’s game. I tell him, the pregnancy is worth the kid!
During my fourth pregnancy (which I lost), people also accused me of being greedy and selfish, and suggested that three healthy children were more than enough. I was mightily offended. Whose business is it to criticize? You are a wonderful mother, with so much to offer your children. I hope you feel better soon, and have a chance to savor your role in creating a new child – a great miracle.
Jennifer, I am so sorry for your loss. And for the thoughtless offensice questions u had to endure.
I agree with Steph, I’m sorry for those rude questions (and for you too, Heather!). We struggled with infertility and FINALLY had a beautiful girl. She’s 4 now and we are constantly bombarded with “every child needs a sibling” and “when are you going to have another” and “you can’t leave E as an only child!” We have been trying for another and it just hasn’t worked…so I think people are just never happy.
It seems if you only have one, it’s not enough. If you have one and lose one, you’re greedy if you try again.
Every family should 100% do what’s right for them and not need to worry for a second about what other people think.
I am so sorry, Jennifer!
It’s gratifying that HG is getting attention, and hopefully people will understand it more now. My daughter has it, and has had it all the way through her first two pregnancies. She is just about twelve weeks along with her third (and the “what were you thinking?” comments have driven her to tears as much as the illness).
Two things that have been true for her. Hyper-salivation seems to be. A constant condition. Along with the throwing up, not being able to keep anything down, and multiple hospitalizations, the over production os saliva is not fun. She has “spit cups” everywhere, pretty gross unless you love her and understand what’s going on.
Second – for her, at least, the HG totally disappears within minutes of delivery. It’s like a miracle.
I am keeping good thoughts for you, Heather. The final outcome, another beautiful baby, will make up for the cruel HG.
The hyper-salivation is disgusting. I don’t understand how I can make so much yet be so dehydrated!
I got away with just the occasional wave of nausea between weeks 8 and 14 of my first pregnancy, so it was a shock to develop HG in my second pregnancy .
I puked so much my oesophagus started to bleed and the blood vessels in my face burst. I was on the point of being hospitalised at 20 weeks when it thankfully eased up. But it was worth every barf to hold that perfect, beautiful baby boy. ((NB everyone told me excessive vomiting meant a GIRL).
Oh my gosh, that esophagus stuff is scary. I have a perpetual sore throat and am terrified something like that will happen. I have burst blood vessels around my nose and I have my fingers crossed that more don’t burst. Right now they are easily covered by makeup.
I thought of you when I read about the Ducchess. Wishing that all who suffer from it receive relief.
I feel terrible for the Dutchess. I had severe 24 hour a day sickness for the first 18 weeks of my pregnancy. Watching the news talk about her ‘condition’ and the reasons for it make me so angry. CNN this morning actually tried to blame her low weight for it. REALLY? What she needs now is a pair of comfy yoga pants, the comfort of some loved ones and a barf bucket or two, not the world’s media hanging out outside her hospital for a photo op. Leave the poor woman alone. I hope you feel better soon, Heather!
I had HG with my pregnancy, and nine years later I’m still not totally over it. I remember well seeking out every restroom in a place so I could be prepared if we had to leave the house for any reason.
I hope yours evens out, and you are able to have some sick-free time with this pregnancy.
Immediately thought of you when I read the news about Kate.
And I can not believe people have called you selfish for wanting more children. I can not think of anything more selfless than parenting! Try lemon drops… they really helped me will the nausea.
I know how difficult dealing with HG is. Fortunately for me, mine did not last the whole pregnancy. I hope that that it improves for you and the rest of your pregnance goes as smoothly as possible.
It never ceases to surprise me how people can be so judgemental and feel they have the right/need to say something to someone on the internet. It really is none of their business. The relative anonymity of the internet seems to allow people to say things to others that they would never say directly.
I enjoy your blog and find it inspirational.
Long time reader, Heather, but I think this is my first comment. I am constantly amazed by your grace, strength, sense of humor, and love for your girls and Mike. Maddie and I have the same birthday, so I feel a connection to a fellow 11-11 baby. Annie is so beautiful and makes me laugh at her antics. Mike’s posts are so witty and warm–I still crack up over his post about faces to make when another driver is being jerky. I wish you all the very best with this pregnancy and cannot wait to share in your joy when the baby arrives. In the meantime, I hope the HG dissipates and you are feeling strong and healthy again soon.
Thank you so much!
I’m sorry you have HG, it sounds awful.
I’m doubly sorry that anyone would be so insensitive and judgmental to ask you some of those other questions.
I think you are an amazing Mommy to BOTH of your girls, and am certain you will be again this time around!
You’re a rock star Heather and I love reading your blog!
Heather-thanks for sharing your story. As a fellow HG sufferer currently pregnant with #2 (only 6 weeks left!) I appreciate you spreading the word to educate people. It’s hard for people who have never experienced it to understand what it’s like. And you are totally right, nine months of illness is totally worth the gift at the end
“She also thought it was really awesome when I (out of necessity) had to throw up in her princess potty and the “You Peed In The Potty! Victory Music” played. Frankly, it was kind of awesome.”
I laughed so hard at that I spewed shredded wheat. (We have that same potty, so I could vividly picture that. Hilarious.)
Also, the “greedy and selfish” thing is kind of funny to me because I also had a tough pregnancy (for different reasons) and we’ve decided not to have another child (for multiple reasons). I’ve been told I’M being greedy and selfish for NOT wanting to put myself through another pregnancy “for the sake of giving my child a sibling.” There’s no pleasing people when it comes to a woman’s personal reproductive choices. It’s so ridiculous.
I feel your pain, I have felt that twice! I had HG, hospitilaxed twice during each pregnancy. I threw up every single day with my girls, I lost 30 lbs during my second one. Every day driving to work I had to drive by Burger King and the smell of that place made me gag. I had to pull over eevry morning and puke on the street, I am sure people must have thought I was some sort of urchin!
In the end of course it was all worth it but man, being pregnant with HG is not fun!
I was thinking of Princess Kate this morning too as I was getting ready for work, thinking about how I would get so sick brushing my teeth each day. I wanted to give her advice on what not to eat because some things hurt more coming back up!
I hope you start to feel better soon, wishful thinking I know, but as soon as that baby is born it will be all worth it! The things we do to ourselves for these little creatures! Take care of yourself. Thinking of you and Kate!
Hmmmm, this post makes me wonder if I actually had HG with my pregnancy last yr. I literally threw up everyday, several times a day starting at 6 weeks and straight through to maybe 18 weeks. It then switched from morning sickness to indigestion/heartburn that also induced vomiting, just not as frequent. I lost 11 lbs in my first trimester and I only weighed 114 pre pregnancy. I remember locating the restroom everytime I walked in to someplace new. I also remember thinking, “Omg this place is gross so I hope I don’t have to vomit in their bathroom!” My oldest also ran behind me everytime I threw up and eventually he associated me going in the bathroom with me throwing up. Everytime I went to the bathroom he’d say, “Mommy, you sick again?” or “Mommy, should I get Daddy?” LOL! He also started mimicking me. Hilarious. It was awful. I tried for 7 yrs to get pregnant and the only thing I enjoyed about my pregnancy was feeling my baby move. Otherwise, it was awful. But, yes, I want another child so I will do it all over again. And if that does make me selfish then I will join the club with a big smile on my face!
I suffered from HG with all three of my pregnancies. I vomited from conception right thru delivery. I lost 30 lbs with my first, 30 lbs with my second (twins) and 20 with my third pregnancy. I couldn’t even keep down sips of water. I was on diclectin (similar to zofran), I would vomit constantly throughout the day. I had lots of ER trips for hydration, and even had home care Iv nutrition.
To answer a comment I saw, at least for me I would vomit my whole stomach contents. Of course most of the time there really isn’t much stomach contents to vomit, in which case what you are vomiting is mostly acid and bile.
My youngest step-daughter had her first baby three weeks ago. She lost fifty pounds while pregnant with him. She could basically hold nothing down for the entire pregnancy.
Tammy M. says:
You are one tough mother! That is said with awe and admiration!
I’m sorry for the insensitive comments and questions you’ve received. I really don’t get some people.
My jaw hit the floor when I saw someone asking you that “Really, another kid?” question on that beautiful recent picture of Annie and Mike. A small picture post about the things you’re thankful for on Thanksgiving, and THAT’S how someone saw fit to respond? I’ll never understand people.
Wishing you as easy a road to your next baby as is physically possible. You’re an amazing mom (and Mike’s an incredible dad), and if your body can take it, no reason at all not to expand your family!!!!!
Emily E says:
I’m pretty sure I had HG with my first but my first OB was pretty much useless. I don’t think she had even heard of Zofran. (And fired me as a patient when at 36 weeks because I wanted a natural birth instead of a completely unnecessary scheduled C-section before she went on HER maternity leave….) THANK GOD I barely had any morning sickness with my other pregnancies. I felt crappy but not throwing up all the time is a definite improvement. I feel so bad for people who have to go through it because it really is completely awful.
It has been 34 years since my first pregnancy, but I can still sympathize wholeheartedly with both you, Kate and whomever else is suffering with this. I was so sick, day and night with my sweet Alissa, in fact, I didn’t gain any weight until I was 6 months pregnant with her and only gained a total of 16 pounds with yhr pregnancy. I actually weighed less after she was born than when I became pregnant with her! And guess what? She was perfect and I did it again! 2 more times as a matter of fact. It was a little better with each pregnancy, but still not the normal “morning sickness”. So, hang in there, it is all worth it when you are holding that precious little baby in your arms.
Kristen McD says:
It’s worth it on the other side, for sure – but I would ask myself why I had chosen to do this at least once a day when I was pregnant with my second. 3 time (2 on purpose, 1 surprise) HG veteran too. It’s misery, and it messes with your head.
Why someone would think you only have one child is beyond me. My dad’s younger sister died at age 25–in 1978. My grandmother died in January. Until the day she died she told people she had five kids, four boys and one daughter. And now, like Maddie, Ann has been gone longer than she was alive. It’s a pain you never get over. But like you said, while they are not physically there, they are still your child! There presence never, ever recedes. Ann was a huge presence in our lives, even though most of my cousins never even met her. We learned a lot about guts and strength from her.
As to your other point, if morning sickness was a turn off to motherhood, there would be a lot less babies in this world. I might not have kids yet but I’ve been horrendously sick before with no reward. None. With morning sickness, you get one!
Ugh, the things people ask. Isn’t one child enough? Isn’t one eyeball enough? Yes, but I prefer to have two, thank you very much.
Wishing you all the best. And now I feel guilty for thinking my morning sickness with my two was bad.
Too be honest, I felt sad as I read your comments re: why you would want more children. For one…this is NO ONE BUSINESS BUT YOURS & MIKES! You should NEVER, EVER have to justify your personal decisions – especially when it comes to having kids. I mean, Really!!! Who would ask such a thing!?!?! I remember when you got pregnant with Annie – some people were SSSOOOO Judgemental accusing you of wanting to replace Maddie. It Made Me SICK!!! I said it then, and I’ll Say It NOW…..Heather….TO EACH THEIR OWN!!! As Mother Tereasa once said “Saying there are too many children is like saying there are too many flowers”. I agree!!! Heather & Mike I say – if you wanna have 50 more little ones GO FOR IT but PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE don’t ever feel like you ever have to justify it. You make GREAT babies and I for one can’t wait to meet your newest little baby!!! Hope you feel better soon!!! Love & Hugs from Canada xoxo
Oh man, throwing up in public is the worst. I was at the beach when I got sick and rather than throwing up in the sand for all to see, I threw up in the porta john. Talk about d.i.s.g.u.s.t.i.n.g. Anyhoo, please take care of your teeth. After I had Ethan and went to the dentist, I had 3 cavitities!!!! It was from throwing up so much and drinking gingerale which has high sugar content in it. I cannot wait to meet the baby!
I would rather vom all over myself than in a porta john! OMG.
I remember when one of my best friends was pregnant. She was so very ill and had trouble keeping even water down. She was also hospitalized for being so sick, which is where upon taking a look at her, they found out she was having twins. So not only was she sick from the babies taking so much from her, but she also had HG. They gave her an IV that was attached to a backpack type thing for home that had this “formula” in it and anti nausea medicine and it basically fed and kept her hydrated. She wasn’t as sick with her 3rd baby, maybe because there was only 1 that time, but she was still pretty sick; or at least compared to my other friends who just had regular morning sickness. I still can’t believe that someone asked you “Isn’t one enough”… umm excuse me, when did it become anyone’s business how many kids you have?! That is a personal choice between you and Mike. If you guys wanted to have 10, then that’s what you want!
Well I certainly hope Mike is treating you like a “Duchess” since you two have so much in common.
I have never heard of HG before. I never had any morning sickness whatsoever with my two children . . .don’t hate me.
I hope you and the Duchess start feeling well very soon.
So sorry for the idiots.
Thanks to you, Heather, I can now ONLY imagine Duchess Kate vomming into a Princess Potty and being greeted with victory music.
Both of my sisters in law had HG with all their pregnancies and it was awful. If anything, I’m glad that this story (and you!) are helping people learn about it. I think sometimes people just thought they were being really dramatic about morning sickness, not understanding that it was all-day-for-nine-months sickness.
Seriously? Who’s the jerk who asked that last question? “Isn’t one child enough” …what a DUMB thing to say! Call ME greedy and selfish, then, for having nine children. Children are blessing and are so worth any discomfort the nine month’s gestation brings. And everyone has “their” number. Seems like Mike and Heather’s number is going to be three. Three is a great number
People really ask you “isn’t one enough?”? That is an insane, rude, and judgemental question. People never fail to astonish me. I’m sorry you have to put up with people like that and take the high road. I pray that the HG evens out for you!
I’m blown away that anyone would call you greedy and selfish. Can I punch them for you? Please?
Regular morning sickness feels so bad to me, I simply cannot imagine what you go through with HG.
I have to admit that I thought of you immediately when I read about Princess Kate having HG. *sheepish*
I do have a question about vomiting in public. I was once in a public bathroom and the lady in the stall next to me was very sick. I asked if there was anything I could do and she said no, she was just pregnant. I still felt so bad for her. What do you hope people will do or say when that happens to you? Do you prefer they not comment and just leave you alone? Or is an offer to help, be it a wet paper towel or something, a good idea?
I missed this question the first time, so sorry for the late reply. You are so kind to even think of offering to help. Most people are (rightly) grossed out by public vomiting, and keep their distance. I unfortunately am forced to throw up in public restrooms almost every time I leave my house, and while I do my best to be quiet there are times when it’s very very obvious what I’m doing. I’ve never had anyone ever ask me if there was anything they could do, to be honest. I think if anyone did I would be totally taken aback. But a wet paper towel would actually be really, really nice, because usually my face is red and hot from bending over and my eyes are watering. I think that if you offered that to someone they would be shocked but very appreciative.
I meant to reply to your reply long ago! I’m sorry. I just want to tell you I appreciate this feedback very much and I have not forgotten it. I’m pregnant too and have a child and when we’re out and about, we find ourselves in a restroom pretty often. I would love to show someone like you a little kindness if I ever have the opportunity. I’m going to remember the wet paper towel. Thanks Heather!!
wow. that sounds completely horrible! it’s a being able to see the forest for the trees issue, right?
no one gets to pass judgment on why or why not someone would want 0, 2 or 10 kids. to each his own.
you’re a rockstar.
Debbie B. says:
I read this post early this morning, and it has been making me crazy all day. “Greedy and selfish” – jeez, some people have HUGE balls to say something like that to you or to anyone. I’m not quite sure how wanting more children, or going through what you are with HG could be perceived as greedy or selfish – but OMG, why can’t people mind their own effing business?! You and Mike are the best parents – Maddie and Annie are proof of that. I hope you start to feel a little better soon, but like you said – nine months of “crappy” is a good trade-off for a “lifetime of happiness.” I can’t wait to welcome another Spohr baby.
Amy Stone says:
Please tell me someone didn’t ACTUALLY ask you some of those questions! Please tell me those were hypothetical questions, because what’s it to ANYONE else how many kids you have?? They don’t have to care for them!
Also, not making light of your situation AT ALL, but I seriously laughed so hard about you barfing in Annie’s princess potty! I wonder if the royal music effect happens to the Duchess when she barfs in any toilet since she IS a real princess
I keep hearing “Kate might be having twins!” because apparently HG is linked to twins.
Any chance your Acrobat has a buddy in there?
NO! Thank goodness! The Acrobat is a solo act.
You and Lee Corso are my favorite Love Story. I have hope for a happy ending someday. (Notice I did not capitalize happy ending).
Love sent your way, Heather.
Maybe we’ll have that happy ending if he rides up on a white horse!
Leslie K says:
Our older son was 7 1/2 when I was pregnant with our younger one. I came out of the bathroom one day after throwing up for the 4th or 5th time and found him standing in the hallway with tears in his eyes, and he said, “Mommy, is it possible to throw up the baby?”
I hope you feel better soon!
Awwwww. Sweet heart!
Jennifer D says:
I too had HG with both my pregnancies and I too would do it all over again in a heartbeat! My 1st pregnancy was much worse then my second but I lost a significant amount of weight with both. It sucks! Zofran helped a little, but I was pretty much couch bound both times! I felt SO guilty that I was pretty unable to really care for my son when I was pregnant with his sister, the disney channel was my babysitter most days, but we both survived and now watching him with his sister/best friend/life long playmate, it makes EVERY.SINGLE. minute of it worth it, a hundred times over!!
Melanie B says:
I never cease to be stunned at the things people will say to someone about their children and pregnancies. You’re married, you have two children and only one is with you, and you can have as many babies as you like. People need to shut up!
Congrats on the baby!
I am so sorry you are suffering thank the good Lord for Zofran!!
Its so funny that it has a name. I remember being in the hospital 6 times with my first for IV’s and at 20 weeks the doctor said you are still sick?
I had it with all three and I would have had 3 more if my body would physically let me it is all worth it in the end. Even when you are barfing in the Operating Room all over your husband.
Princess Kate wants to be just like you
On a serious note, I can’t believe people question you wanting more children. I see absolutely nothing selfish about wanting to love and raise another child. It isn’t that Annie isn’t enough and I am beyond angry that someone would suggest that to you. I love you.
I love you too Ducks!
I love your answer to the last question, especially. I kinda want to ghetto snap at the nosy rudeness of some people for you.
I don’t understand how people would think that wanting to have more children is “selfish” of you….do these people have children?? Do they know what raising a child entails? Raising children is the complete opposite of selfish. I am so thankful that I never got super sick with any of my pregnancies, because if I did, it might make me question whether or not I could handle another pregnancy. I think you awesome to brave another pregnancy with all the hardships you have had in the past. You are a wonderful person with a huge heart.
Marin D says:
I commented on one of your other posts about my bouts with HG. I wanted to chime in on the more than one child thing. My doctors encouraged me to have a second pregnancy because you cannot predict whether or not you will have it again. Of course, I wasn’t lucky and had it a second time. Due to the HG and some other complications, my doctors, husband, and I decided two was enough. I am grateful I got to make that decision while others don’t but my body could not endure the extreme weight loss, dehydration, etc. and I had some residual kidney damage from my first pregnancy. Like every child/person, every pregnancy is different. I hope you get some relief soon.
Amy S. says:
Some people are judgmental jerks! I really hope the HG fizzles out and you can enjoy this last pregnancy!
Expat Mom says:
With my last pregnancy, I was extremely ill the entire 9 months. In retrospect, it was likely HG, but I didn’t realize it and didn’t think to ask my doctor for help until close to the end when he looked at me and said, “This has been going on the entire time?” Um, yes . . .
During that time, I took my two older sons on a trip to Canada to meet their grandparents for the first time and was so sick, I couldn’t do much at all. I actually puked off their front porch once because there was no time to hit the bathroom and I heard my then 5 year old say, “Don’t go outside, Mama’s puking AGAIN.” My 4 year old was mad at the baby for making me so sick. Just think, though, you have more interesting stories than the average pregnant woman!
I had HG with my twins. People really didn’t believe me that I threw up all day until they saw me in action, which does not help with a professional appearance. Luckily, I work at NASA and my coworkers would bring me barf bags from the Vomit-Comit (Zero-G aircraft). My coworkers also adjusted to my constant tapping (coping mechanism, maybe?), spitting (so much spit), and finding me in the bathroom or lying down in the conference room.
My twins ARE worth it, but it is a brave journey to travel another time.
I wish you luck and hope that you know that every day brings you closer to your goal.
Hugs and love!
I normally just read your posts w/o comment, but felt compelled to this time, the last question….I can’t believe someone actually asked that…REALLY. I’m glad that you are such a strong woman with such a large support system (family and friends) you go girl
I am so sorry you feel so awful Heather! I didn’t realize this condition was so prevalent thank you for the education. Strangely enough what this makes me think of is some completely ridiculous article a month or two ago I saw online that some new flu vaccine needle was coming out with the “thinnest needle ever.” My thought was really?! There are scientists trying to make the thinnest needle ever?! Let’s maybe put them on cancer research or spina abifada treatment. Now I will add HG and other pregnancy related medical issues to that list of way more worthy causes in my brain.
Here’s hoping there is some medical cocktail or tool that can bring you some kind of relief!
Is there anyway to get pre-tested for HG? Or is it something you only can detect while pregnant. I feel so bad for you, this sounds horrible!
nope, there’s no way to know if you’ll get it until it happens. But the odds are very, very low that you’ll have it.