We saw Dr. Risky yesterday. I’ve been seeing her every two weeks, although she’s given me the option to come in every week if I prefer. My anxiety level has been much lower during this pregnancy than any of the other three…I think that’s partly because I’m making a very conscious effort to stay as chill as possible, and partly because I’m just too tired to get scared/stressed. There have been lots of times when I should have been crazy-anxious but instead I’ve been like, “can I take a nap on this table, please?” My exhaustion, it is powerful.
I think I also just really want to experience a normal pregnancy (or as normal as I can have), so I am freaking determined to force this pregnancy into normalcy. Which we all know is out of my control, but we all also know I am a control freak. Maddie’s pregnancy had complications right away, Annie’s was complicated by grief and my newly diagnosed clotting disorder, and my third pregnancy barely got off the ground. With that history I should definitely be stressing out, but I’m just…not. I’m ignoring or handing-off stressful situations, focusing on Annie, and sleeping whenever humanly possible (“It’ll be a twenty-minute wait for this prescription? Oh I don’t mind, I’ll just be right in that chair, napping.” Actual thing I said to a pharmacist this week. And then I napped in that chair.).
Dr. Risky’s nurses take my vitals at the beginning of every appointment. I was down 3.75 pounds from my last weigh-in almost two weeks ago. I’m down a significant bit of weight overall and I’m just really, really hoping that I can, at the very least, stop losing weight. It’s just not good. Dr. Risky is hoping that, now that I’m starting my second trimester, things will get better. That makes two of us. She’s more concerned over my ability to stay hydrated. She actually told me “You can go to the ER again for fluids if you want.” But um, no. I did not want. Who wants to go to the ER during cold and flu season? Not me.
The Acrobat looked all baby-shaped in my uterus.
As long as The Acrobat is growing well, I’m happy.
When we got home, we showed Annie the ultrasound picture. She said, “Ohhhhhh, my baby is so cute!” I asked her if she could point out the different parts of the baby, and this is what she said everything was:
She thinks the entire picture is the baby’s face. The baby’s mouth is the sac the baby is in. The baby itself is apparently the tongue, and then the random black circle at the bottom is the baby’s bottle. I can sort of see what she’s going for, but really I can’t get past the baby being its own tongue.
Becca Masters says:
Aw, sucks about the weight loss, the sickness really does take it out of you when pregnant! I’m sure it’ll begin to pick up really soon.
Have you said when you’re due?
I can’t wait to see all of your bump photos!
Lilian says:
Awww, so funny how Annie interprets the ultrasound picture.. Made me laugh! I hope your Doc is right, and that the second trimester will be better for you!
On a different note, I am so impressed with your use of “Friendsisms” (is that a word?). “I’m Breezy” … awesome! ha!
Kayla says:
I had actually forgotten about the nicknames you do for pregnancy, and was thinking to myself just as I opened this post, “I hope she nicknames the baby soon!” So when I saw the post was tagged The Acrobat…I got tears in my eyes. The name reminds me of the series of photos of Maddie taken during the ’08 Summer Olympics where she upside down in her crib. So, so sweet.
And lol to Annie’s thoughts on the picture – ah, two-year olds. Ya gotta love ‘em. As always, best wishes and much love!
P.S. I totally second the poster above me – can’t wait for the coming bump photos!
Ali says:
Pregnancy was quite the diet for me – I lost 19 pounds until I started to gain around 18-20 weeks. I was so queasy, and loved me some Zofran! The dr assured me that the baby was getting what he needed, it was just at my expense. We joked that this kid was going to be named tater tot (boy) or ginger ale (girl) because that was all I could choke down. I just reminded myself often: it’s all worth it. Little tater tot was certainly worth it.
Jennifer says:
Annie reads an ultrasound just like my mother. I’m 36 weeks and had quite a few, and after every one one I show my mom the picture and she is in complete utter confusion.
I’m so glad you are stressing less this time around. I got scary news at 12 weeks and dwelled on it every single day until 20 weeks or so until I got a grip on myself. Now at 36 weeks into my pregnancy (a healthy one, those tests meant nothing) I regret not enjoying the early days. All you can do is take care of yourself as best as you can and try to relax your mind.
Sending positive thoughts your way. Thanks for sharing your journey with us. I’ve been following your blog since Maddie was young and have been rooting for you every step of the way. Your amazing!
TamaraL says:
Wow, that bottle in your uterus must hurt!
Looks like a very cute little baby in there!! Hope your nausea is almost over…but good for you for not stressing!
Jill says:
I can totally see that big huge baby tongue – very cute.
Continuing to pray for a healthy baby. Oh, and less puking
Jenni says:
Heather, you make me smile. What a precious story, even the part where you slept in a chair at the pharmacy
These times in a woman’s life are so special, I know you’re enjoying it as much as you can!
shan says:
The baby’s bottle got me. That is priceless! Annie is going to be a fabulous big sister!
andy says:
I love Annie’s description!
Erin Christine says:
Annie is so cute! I love your subtle quotes from Friends…one of my favorite episodes!!!
Hoping you are well:-)
Glenda says:
Annie is to freaking funny. How cute!
Hope you start feeling better soon and gaining weight!
Best always!
Michele says:
Your little boy is a doll! :o) Yep, I had a dream the other night that I was babysitting for you and your son was just the sweetest little thing next to MY sweet little baby boy. LOL Oh and I promise not to let him have the drumsticks until he’s much older and I’ll spare you the details of that part of the dream…..
So glad all looks perfect with Acrobat.
Denise says:
Hope you start to feel better soon. The second trimesters are usually nicer. I can only imagine how tired you must be of drinking water.
Jenia says:
First off, LOOK AT THAT BABY!!! Woo hoo!!
Anyway, I lost 10% of my body weight during the first trimester (I only weighed 111, so it was a significant amount of weight loss…) and I spent most of my first trimester in the ER getting fluids. However, my Dr said the same thing, that I’d gain during the second trimester. Surely, I didn’t wake up on the morning that my second trimester started, sporting extra weight, but eventually I did begin to gain
Also, something you said caught my attention…
“so I am freaking determined to force this pregnancy into normalcy. Which we all know is out of my control…”
Some may not agree with me here, but it CAN be in your control as much as you allow it to be
When you think things in to fruition, they usually happen! A few weeks ago, we were hitting rock bottom b/c my husband was out of work, we couldn’t afford to pay our mortgage, and both of our kids have birthdays in Dec plus Christmas! We were worried 
I am a psychology major and on Monday night, our professor instructed us to write down 3 things that we wanted to happen in our lives, then believe that they would happen. I only wrote down two: My husband finds a job that he loves and that we are pulled out of the financial bind we were in. Tuesday afternoon, my husband got a call that he was chosen for a position at a job that he really wanted! He was able to start the very next day and he LOVES it! Also, on Wednesday, I went to check our account to see which bills we could afford to pay. I almost fell out of my chair when I saw an unexpected deposit from the GI bill back paying me for 3 months of housing expenses and books!! It was seriously enough to catch up on our house note and stick the rest in savings! I still am on cloud 9 over that!
So I say all of this to say that since you are determined to have a normal pregnancy (as normal as a pregnancy can get for you considering your health history), chances are that you will! So far it is working for you b/c look at that healthy baby growing in there! Keep the positive attitude!
Skye says:
I’m so glad you’re less stressed and The Acrobat is doing well! Really, really hoping for decreased nausea for you. Although it’s understandable to feel so sick when you have a bottle inside of you.
Leslie says:
My daughter is nearing the end of her first trimester of her third pregnancy. She has extremely severe hypermemsis – has been hospitalized in all three pregnancies for dehydration, and can’t even hold down a sip of water when it’s at its worst. She is on zofran, reglan(sp?) and pepsid for acid reflux.
This time around, after three days in the hospital last week – (took 36 hours to get her hydrated enough that she even began to pee again with IV lactated ringers and IV zofran and IV reglan and IV pepcid for the awful retching/acid reflux) – instead of an “open order” for hydration in the ER, which she won’t use because of the same reasons you don’t want to go there – she has an “open order” to be admitted into a room in the maternity ward of the hospital for IV hydration any time she needs it. Her insurance, which is an HMO, has agreed to cover up to 30 such visits.
It seems so much better, because she will not need to get authorization – the nurses just told her to come on in any time day or night – and she has a private space for the hydration, which if she stays on top of it, shouldn’t require an overnight stay.
Maybe your insurance will allow for the same?
I really feel for you, especially after watching my daughter and her husband go through this. They have two of the most adorable daughters, though (2 and 4 yrs old), so they know it’s worth it in the end. As do you!
Heather says:
Oh my gosh…I am going to ask my doctor about this today! If I’m being honest, I should have gotten hydration yesterday but the idea of catching something was overwhelming. This is a great solution. I hope I can work something out like this!
Kristen says:
I was going to write a comment and say the same thing. I am nearing the end of my 1st trimester, second pregnancy and I have hypermesis also. I had it so bad with my first pregnancy I lost 20lbs, this one I have only lost 10lbs so far.
Anyhow, I went in to a naturopathic Dr. yesterday for I/V vitamins and hydration. It was lovely. I got to sit in her office and wait for the IV to finish up. The ER was my other option, but I was not about to surround myself with all those germs either.
My insurance covers $300 of a Naturopathic Dr. visits a year, and the IV fluids were $80. That was only because of the vitamins that I had though, I am sure just saline would be much less.
The vitamins incase you were interested were called a “Meyer’s cocktail” and are supposed to help you feel better and have more energy. All run of the mill stuff, Calcium, magnesium, vit a, vit b(s) and vit d. So far I feel miles better today that I did before getting the fluids. I still have a bit of a queezy stomach, but I don’t feel like a bag of crap to top it off.
Lisa says:
Oh its a boy. That is my bet all the way. Cant wait for another update!
Trisha says:
Annie’s imagination and creativity crack me up. She’s such a doll.
Continue to rest as much as Annie will allow and hoping you stop losing weight soon. At least your little acrobat is growing and hopefully your 2nd trimester brings less nausea.
susanmig says:
annie is quite the imaginative one! it really is funny to see things through a little ones eyes, right?
the acrobat looks amazing and your attitude is even more so. rock on, mamma!
peace
Tara says:
SO glad your baby is growing and healthy! And I LOVE Annie’s interpretation of the ultrasound photo. She and my husband are totally on the same page as far as that goes.
If you are just starting your 2nd trimester, that means we must have nearly the exact same due date. Fun
Hoping and praying you feel better soon!! ((HUGS))
Annalisa says:
I had a co-worker who lost weight the first six months, until she finally started gaining some… when she was put on a diabetic diet. Go figure. As someone else said above, I bet the baby is gaining just fine, it’s just you who’s having a tough time.
Also, I like Annie’s description of the ultrasound. It makes it sound much more fun than how it is in there. Alas, at the rate I’m going about having a second kid, by the time we’re at the ultrasound stage, my daughter will be able to read them as well as a technician.
twingles says:
Awww…..no one likes to lose weight while preggers but I lost 13 pounds with my twin pg….and 20 with my DD. Thought I’d never stop getting sick with her – happened right up to 20 weeks (sorry). Perinatologist told me they don’t worry unless you still aren’t gaining at 20 weeks and “unless you were bone thin to start with” (DOH!). Remember once you feel better protein is your friend.
Good luck!
Miriam says:
Good for you on making an effort to not let worry drive you through this pregnancy. I know it’s not easy, but I think it’s great that you are making an effort.
And IMHO you could not be in better hands with Dr. Risky. I miss her, seeing her was so comforting when I was pregnant.
Brooke says:
So exciting! Tongue or not, that’s one cute baby growin’ in that thar belly.
Kirsten says:
HA! That made me laugh…
I’m so glad you are feeling “chill” this time. I am about 6 weeks pregnant and after losing a pregnancy last march, I’m a nervous wreck! Trying very hard to be chill…but I guess it is what it is…I think I’ll calm down a bit after my first ultrasound.
Congrats on that little spohr in there – Annie is going to be the BEST big sister ever
SJ says:
Sometimes when I wake up before the alarm, i lay in bed and scroll through the blogs on my phone. Just seeing your title up there made me grin first thing this morning
You sound good.
Brenn says:
Easy, breezy, beautiful Heather. It’s all good! I’m glad the acrobat already has a bottle. But I wouldn’t want to birth that along with the baby…. lol
Sarah says:
Hoping you feel better soon! Annie is hilarious – such a personality! Appreciate the Friends/Monica reference. I throw that in at the end of an awkward voice mail sometimes and nobody ever gets it. Probably their loss.
Lilian says:
hahaha, I was surfing the TV channels and a rerun of Friends was playing, and it’s the “I’m Breezy” episode! Watching it right now.
mary ann says:
I love Annie’s bottle comment, she is so cute! The baby looks wonderful I hope you’re feeling better soon, it sucks to feel awful.
Lydia says:
I love the title of this post. My response to it is……
“Hey, you can’t SAY you’re breezy, that, that totally negates the breezy.”