I was talking with another mom yesterday about our summers. She was telling me all the fun things she’d done with her daughter, and the whole time I was thinking, “Oh, that sounds fun. Oh, Annabel would love that. Oh, I should take her to do that this summer.” And then I realized that Annie is starting school in two weeks, so summer is basically over. How did that happen?!
Obviously, having a baby is what happened, but I still feel like I’m caught in a time warp. Somehow, it’s been almost twelve weeks since James was born. I have no idea how that much time has passed. I’ve felt one step behind on everything, and my memory is terrible. There are some things that happened over the last twelve weeks that, if it were not for the blog posts, I would have no recollection of them happening. That’s a little scary when I think about it.
It’s no newsflash that two kids are more work than one, but for some reason I was not anticipating how tired I would be. I guess I’d forgotten how exhausting new babies are. James is the easiest of my three babies, but a baby plus a three-year-old plus working at night after everyone goes to sleep is definitely not the best way to get the rest my brain needs.
I’d wanted to do so many things with Annabel this summer, but it’s not like she was ignored. She had eight weeks of swim lessons, play dates and birthday parties, and a trip to the fair. She had to spend more time inside than she probably wanted, and some days our fun activity was going to the drive-through Starbucks, but I tried to make it fun.
When Annie starts school after Labor Day, we’ll finally settle into our routine. I’m hopeful that the New Mom Fog will lift and my brain will start functioning more like I want it to. It seems a bit like a lost summer, but it was still one of the best summers of my life because I got to spend it with these two:
What are their names again?
don’t beat yourself up over it. Your kids are happy and healthy , you’re a great mom…be kind to yourself!
Annabel knows no different and that IS just life. Having had two summer babies, I get it. But we just rolled as best we could…
And every time I see a picture of James, is is clear how engaged he is at all times…my little niece is just not. I know…I shouldn’t worry but I am certain with my first that she was as engaged as James by looking at all the photos I have etc…There is just something there that I can’t seem to shake. Argh.
James and Annabel look so darn cute…DO you look back and think like me? That when there was only one you wondered how you could love two and then see it was just meant to be? Ah….
I know exactly how you feel. I had my second a week before James was born, went back to work after six weeks and I have no idea where summer has gone. I don’t recall much of what we’ve done except a whole lot of cleaning house, yard work and being really really tired. I’m hoping we can make more of next summer but like you said about Annie, my oldest also did swimming, t-ball, a trip to the watermark for the weekend and several small events that he really enjoyed. You are an awesome mom! Annie and James are very blessed
Don’t forget all the fun stuff you guys did with Annie before James was born as well. Please don’t beat yourself up about this especially since little ones have no sense of time! My kids are 9, 13 & 15 and they don’t remember over half the things we did with them when they were little which kills me by the way because I was like you making sure we did something fun a day even if that meant just going to the park or going swimming. No Worries Heather…by the looks of all the pictures you post, Annie is having an AMAZING summer besides….you live in CALIFORNIA!!! So, even when she starts school you will still have the best weather to still do a lot of fun stuff outside – going to the beach, Disney, etc. You are a wonderful Mama and Mike is a wonderful daddy and although it might seem like you didn’t have the best of summers, just look at the MASSIVE SMILE On Annie’s face….I think she had a great summer!!
Casey P says:
I always say that if it weren’t for pictures and my blog, I would not remember my daughter’s first year! Newborns make for very sleep deprived mamas and dads…and sleep deprived people just cannot remember anything. Thank goodness for photos! And what others have said are probably right – I doubt my 4 year old will remember much about any given summer anyway…so no pressure to keep her super engaged. You’re doing a great job – and maybe, just maybe, your memory will return eventually
I don’t have new mom fog but I don’t know where summer went either! School here started on 8/7!!
There are so many fun things to do but very often my twins just want to stay home. I am thinking if you ask Annie she will say that she is having the best summer ever.
Their names are Annabel and James:) Ha Ha!!! You are a great mama!!! Those are two very lucky babies right there.
I love that last picture! They look like they have so much fun together. I was hoping my cat would love our new baby as much as Annie loves James… but the cat is still scared after 5 months. Silly cat loves playing with baby toys and rubbing and laying on baby stuff, but I guess the baby is still a strange animal to him.
The summer before Maya started preschool was like that since I had just had Anna. But, when asked what she had done that summer on the first day of school she managed to come up with a big list and top on the list was become a big sister. I bet Annie doesn’t think the summer was lost at all.
Ditto with what all of your other readers are saying: try not to stress about it because to a 3 year old, a trip to the Starbucks drive-through IS fun! And as you pointed out, she was certainly not ignored. You’ve chronicled plenty of fun activites on your blog (the mom fog is probably just stopping you from remembering them!) and you and Mike also gave Annabel a playmate she’ll have forever in her sweet little brother James. Judging from her giant smiles when she is with him, I think she’s happy with getting a brother out of this summer!
Your children are beautiful. SO beautiful. I feel your joy over them every time you post a new picture. Thank you.
And Annabel had a wonderful summer because she is loved so completely, which is what we all need to be happy:) Plus, she got to become a big sister! Doesn’t get much better than that.
….YOU HAVE A DRIVE THRU STARBUCKS?????????
I hate to tell you this but…we actually have TWO drive thru Starbucks!
We have two if not three here.
I live in Texas, and the majority of the Starbucks here are drive thru:-)
I’m pretty positive Annie had the best summer ever bc her brother was finally here!!!!!
Expat Mom says:
I don’t even take my kids out for entire weeks at a time. They have NO swimming lessons or anything except track for the oldest. Annie’s got it good. You’re doing a great job with her and James. Plus, school doesn’t mean the end of fun!
With the big sister at school, maybe you can nap with James and get rid of some of the fog, too.
My son was born premature in early June 2010, and I had a six year old at home. We did very little, because I didn’t want him out in crowds until he’d had his 2 month shots, and that particular summer was hot as blazes, so not a ton of pool or park time. So my 6 yr old was stuck inside a lot.
She’s nine now and she looks back fondly on the time that the three of us (Daddy was at work-someone’s gotta!) had together hunkered down in the air conditioning. Our fun outing was usually Sonic, because it didn’t require getting out of the car!
Right before i read this post, I was thinking about how I’d pay YOU to hang out with your kids. Like, usually, you’d have to pay a babysitter, but I’d shell out cash to meet and greet Annie and James. This could be a business venture, renting out your kids.
In a non-internet-creepy way.
Oh my goodness, that picture is absolutely darling!
We put our oldest in Montessori (year round!) the month before our second was due, so that I would feel okay about being a braindead blob a lot of the time.
Annie had a great summer Heather! She got to spend it with her three favorite people AND she got to share her summer with her baby brother. I don’t think this is a lost summer at all.
Don’t sell yourself short! Remember all those trips/special things you took with Annabel before James arrived? That’s exactly why you did those things…to get all the fun and exciting things before your summer came and went like a flash, and to make her feel so happy.
I’m sure she had a great summer. She’ll remember the fun she had with her baby brother and that’s most important.
Not to worry about their names Heather. You are loving up and enjoying/surviving your Cutie Patoohties!
This summer flew by. I feel like my kids got a bum deal this summer because having a baby in June pretty much did our summer in. Not too many beach days for my kids, unless daddy was home to take them. Not much pool time for my kids, again unless daddy was home to take them. So much time spent in the house. Blah. Oh well, it’s just one summer, right? There’s plenty more to come.
I’m a mother of 4. Hailey is 13, Logan is 10, Madison 5 & Trey 11 months. The big 3 went back to school yesterday, this was Madison’s first year of school, and first time being away from Mommy besides time spent with grandparents and her aunts. Like you I had lots of plans for this summer, but ended up doing very few. As other posts have mentioned I’m sure Annie loved her summer & didn’t even realize that you were in your “mom fog”. Take advantage of nap time while she’s in school, & maybe that will help some. Good Luck to you & Annie for her first school day!
Marin D says:
Ah, don’t fret about it. We did a whole lot of nothing growing up and ya know, I don’t hate my parents. LOL. I am the same way with my kids. We don’t do a lot of stuff. We hang out around the house. My husband takes the girls to the movies every now and then. And you know what I hear at least once a week? Mom, today was the best day ever. Uh, all we did was go out to eat. Or, uh, all we did was go to some stores. Or, uh, all we did was visit a friend. My friends who keep their kids entertained all of the time with exciting things, well, their kids, need entertaining all of the time. (My sister’s stepdaughter is a huge example of this. It has been a difficult adjustment for my sister as she is used to doing her own thing or kids entertaining themselves.) I love that my girls will go play by themselves and have fun without me needing to entertain them 24 hours a day. I don’t love the messes they create but at least I can do the dishes by myself.
I don’t have a new baby but I still feel like this summer went way faster than any in the past. Also, drive they Starbucks is a mommy’s best friend!! That is, until your toddlers figure out that they sell CAKEPOPS there. Omg.