It’s a very good thing Annabel has Mike as her daddy. He has what seems like endless amounts of patience for the things that drive me insane. This is why he is now in charge of meal time. I am officially tapping out.

Annie used to be the best eater. Anything we put in front of her she ate with gusto. Maddie ate like a bird so Annie was such a relief. Then she turned two and UGH. Two year olds. Driving moms crazy since two years after the dawn of time.

The thing that makes me the most crazy is that one day she will LOVE  a certain meal. LOVE. IT. Can’t get enough of it.

eating salad

And then the next time I give it to her, “Annie no like it! NOOOO!”

Even if I was going to give in and offer her different foods, it wouldn’t matter because this is how that conversation would go (uh…hypothetically):

Me: OK, if you don’t want eggs, what do you want? Do you want cereal?
Annie: NOOOOO.
Me: Yogurt?
Annie: NOOOOO.
Me: Banana?
Annie: NOOOOO.
Me: Ice cream?
Annie: NOOOOO.
Annie, five minutes later: Mama? Annie hungry.
Me: SON OF A %^*$^%!!

That conversation could hypothetically happen 187 times a day. Which is why I don’t offer her choices. Also because I am the boss and I am not a short-order cook. I’m not even a short-microwave cook. I am short, though.

This is where Mike comes in handy. He will sit there while she freaks out about her meal. He will listen when she tells him five minutes later that she’s hungry, and then he’ll give her the same meal she previously turned down. Repeat, repeat, until she finally eats it. Meanwhile, I am in the fetal position on the couch, biting a pillow to keep from screaming. Meal times are my kryptonite.

However, I can listen to the same song on mega-repeat and play dress up all day, so I have that on Mike.

She has Katniss Everdeen-like stubbornness, except Katniss was actually hungry (Hunger Games reference, holler!). I’m hoping this whole meal-refusal thing is another one of those “stages,” because unlike massive same-song dance parties, meal times come up thrice daily (dance parties are twice a day wut wut) and my patience for these games is gone.