My brother and I shared a room from birth until early in elementary school. At some point, my mother alleges, I was asked which bedroom I wanted for myself: the room I currently shared with my brother, or the guest room. This is when I supposedly picked the guest room. I find all of this highly suspicious, for the following reasons:
~ The room I shared with Kyle was way bigger and I was no fool;
~ The guest room was known (by Kyle and me) to have a haunted closet;
~ I still wanted to sleep in our shared room.
My stuff was eventually moved to that guest room, and I used the space to declare my love for all things 80s. But at night, I would say goodnight to my parents, then go into my brother’s room and climb into my old twin bed on my old side of the room. It was familiar and safe, and most importantly, across the hall from that haunted closet.
Kyle and I would talk long-past bedtime, whispering at first, then getting louder and more careless until the hallway light would spill through the cracks of his almost-closed door, a sure sign that our mom was onto us. We’d lower our voices until the light went out, then start whispering again. We made up games and stories and would stay up late into the night, only stopping when one of us succumbed to sleep.
I’m not sure how old I was when I stopped sleeping in my old bed. In junior high we’d stopped playing imagination games and started playing mind games, but that’s a whole other post. The sweet innocence of playing pretend with a sibling is on my mind a lot as I watch Annabel’s imagination at work with her toys. I wonder what games she and her older sister would have created. What stories would they have spun, what secrets would they have whispered to each other when the lights were off?
It will be a long time until Annabel has a sibling she can invent worlds with. I want her to have a confidante, that partner-in-everything that I grew up with. I can’t wait until I’m the mom in the hallway listening to her kids whisper and create and giggle when they should be sleeping.
You will be that mom one day. I know it!
Looking at little Kyle I see a lot of Maddie.
Yes! I see Maddie too… the curls in the hair… the smile…
Nancy [Spinning My Plates] says:
My kids shared rooms until about three or four months ago. Those moments of hearing them chat each other to sleep were priceless. I hope you and Mike get those moments sooner than later.
I must admit, I do love hear my kids all laughing together….it is MUCH more appealling then hearing them F-I-G-H-T & ripping each others faces off!! Ha ha ha
I KNOW you WILL get that moment Heather….many moments in fact!! Hoping you’ll hear the pitter patter of new little feet in NO Time F-L-A-T!!!! And when you do…..What a LUCKY little baby that will be!!!!!!
Lots of prayers for a healthy full term sibling sometime in the future for Annie.
I love the stories of you and your brother. I just had twins 3 weeks ago, a boy and a girl, and I would love for them to have a closeness like that. They don’t interact too much at this point, but the last few days I’ve noticed my son will hold his sister’s hand while I nurse them. It melts my heart. I can’t wait to see their relationship grow.
I, too, see a lot of Maddie in your twin brother.
I’m going to be corny and wish you healthy baby dust.
You will be that mom! It’s fun! Both of my kids (boy/girl) had their own rooms. My daughter being the youngest and loving to spend the night in her brothers top bunk or on the floor shared those moments. It’s a relationship they had since she was born (3 yrs apart) and still holds solid to this day. They are each others BF’s and confidantes.
I pray you will get to be that mother too, sometime soon and very healthy.
I will take your words, and remember the next time I want to get frustrated that they are STILL.UP.TALKING, and I will be grateful instead.
Andrea Deacon says:
I’ve been reading your blog for a long time now but never was able to comment myself. This post really hit me though b/c as of late this is a big thing on my mind. My son Leo will be 3 in Feb. and the older he gets and the more he talks and plays, the harder it seems to gets. His twin brother Milo died when they were 3 1/2 months old and watching him grow up without his other half is tearing me apart. This Christmas was especially hard b/c with every present he opened and got excited about all I could do was think of how fun it would be with the 2 of them enjoying these things together. You truly are an inspiration to me Heather with how you handle things and how you’re able to put into words so much that I feel but can’t express. I hope for another child for you soon but know it will never be the same as having Maddie here with you. Thinking of you always, Andrea
The Woman Formerly Known as Beautiful says:
I understand yearning. We all yearn for how we want things to be. And of course you wonder what if… but your little girl knows the life she has now. And it sounds like you’ve made it such a beautiful life. She will have fond memories of her childhood that you can’t imagine because her experience will be uniquely her own. She’s such a lucky little girl. xo
I totally thought you were going to announce a pregnancy!
I know!! Gah Heather, it’s time for another baby lady! (;
There is nothing better than a sibling. I wanted my daughter to have that sisterly bond for so long, and now even though my girls are fourteen years apart in age, they are very good buddies. Fight and love like any other siblings.
This two little kids looks great…Thanks for sharing..
katrina @ They All Call Me Mom says:
This is such a sweet post. We have plenty of whispering at bedtime going on around here
I really hope that you get to experience that too. You and your brother were so cute!! My two sons aged 19 and 16 years are so close, I honestly cannot remember the last time they fought, would have been years and years ago. Lachlan used to creep into his older brother’s room up till the age of about 10 when he was scared at night. I have one sister but we are not close at all, never were. It is wonderful when siblings are not just siblings but real friends too. Annie is just the cutest little girl and you and Mike are wonderful parents.
My twins are also boy/girl and share a room. They have asked to be moved to the other side and then back again (because they have things to discuss). They are 4 and I know at some point they might want separate rooms. For right now I am enjoying all the moments of the sibling secret society that I can (b/c I know and as you wrote – the mind games will replace the imagination games one of these days). Thank you for sharing. Take care.