Mike’s favorite professional baseball team has made the playoffs.
Mike: So you are going to root for the Giants, right?
Mike: But their arch rivals fired you! And Annie is in love with Buster Posey.
Heather: That entire sentence needs to be corrected. First, I was laid off, NOT fired. Second, Annie is in love with Justin Beiber.
Mike: Justin Bieber throws like a girl
Heather: Well, he sings like a girl, so it works.
Mike: It will make Mikey so happy if the Giants win. They’ve never won!
Heather: It would make me happy if you stopped referring to yourself in the third person.
Mike: I will be miserable to live with if they lose.
Heather: You will be insufferable to live with if they win! You’d probably start wearing your Giants T-shirts to work, and get one of those car flags and drive around honking. *GASP* You’d be like…a Lakers fan.
Mike: That’s just mean.
Heather: I’m not worried about it. The Giants have no hitting. But they DO have those yummy crab sandwiches out in center field, toasted to perfection, mmmm.
Mike: Their hitting is not great. But they have historically great pitching…blah blah blah stats blah blah…are you listening to me?
Heather: No. I’m thinking about that crab sandwich.
Mike: Let me tell you something about the greatest player in baseball right now, blah blah blah player name blah blah…HEATHER!
Heather: I miss the All American Girls Professional Baseball Team from “A League of Their Own.” I saw that movie and I cried. I totally wanted to be cool like Gena Davis. I wonder what Gena Davis is up to these days?
Mike: She’s rooting for the Giants.
Heather: Your star pitcher is a dude with hair as long as mine. I’m pretty sure he’s a hippie.
Mike: Yes, a 160 pound pot smoking hippie. How can you not root for his team?
Heather: Pot is an illegal substance, Michael. He’s setting a bad example for America’s youth.
Mike: Plus the closing pitcher is psychotic and dies his beard black. He looks like he’s playing Moses in a 1950s big screen biblical epic.
Heather: While I give props to a man that isn’t afraid to break out the hair dye, why is he dying his BEARD? And why does he have a mohawk? Remember when baseball players used to say “aw shucks” and stuff? And call you ma’am?
Mike: You came home and cried when a Dodger player called you Ma’am.
Heather: That was different! He was MY AGE!
Mike: I guess he didn’t think so.
Heather: I’m not rooting for the Giants. But I will root for you to be happy. Even though you basically just said I looked old.
Mike: That’s not…fine. I’m sure Annie will root for them with me.
Heather: That’s against the rules.
Mike: FINE! I AM AN ISLAND!
Heather: OH, that reminds me that Survivor is on! Thanks Mike!
Last day to enter to win Kitchen Awesomeness!