Mike was gone the last five days for a business trip, which meant every possible clichéd thing happened:
~Annie didn’t nap on any of the days he was gone. No nap. And she woke up at 6am on two of the days.
~Annie also got sick with a runny nose and cough. I was convinced it was from her two-year molars, until…
~ I got sick, with one of those swallowing-razors sore throats. I am a baby about sore throats. Wah.
~ SPIDERS EVERYWHERE. On the ceiling, on the wall, everywhere I look, there is a spider. I am ready to burn my house down.
This was my first extended amount of time in our new house without Mike. And…man, I was really a wimp about it. I hate being in a house alone at night. This is a house that is constantly settling, popping and cracking no matter the hour, but at night the same noises I ignore all day scare me. I don’t know what it is about being alone in a house that scares me more than being in an apartment.
Last night Rigby was particularly agitated. She barks during the day when she sees birds and such, but at night she is normally calm as can be (even when there actually IS a reason to bark). Except last night, she was running around like crazy, and most disconcertingly, standing at the window to the backyard, barking like a nut. I was pretty annoyed-slash-concerned, and then someone rang my doorbell. RING RING RING three times in a row. Oh, and it was 9:45pm.
I about had a freaking heart attack. Rigby went nuts. I went to the door and peered out the peep-hole…and saw nothing. No freaking WAY was I going to open the door. I’ve seen plenty of horror movies. Instead, I went in Annie’s room to get her back to sleep (doorbell + barking = “Gwamma! Gwamma is here!”), and then I might have stayed in there all night, in her rocking chair. To protect her, obviously. Not at all because I was freaked out and needed a two-year old to make me feel better. Definitely not. (And I definitely didn’t jump out of my skin when she screamed in the middle of the night for reasons unknown.)
I am so glad Mike is home today. Annie missed him like crazy. I missed him, too, and not just because he investigates every bump in the night and makes me feel safe. He also takes care of me when I’m sick. And I really like him a lot. And he kills spiders, UGH so ready to burn this place down.
sickies on the couch
InDueTime says:
I HATE when NYEBoy goes on business trips. Thankfully, they are few and far between.
Chris says:
Isn’t it funny how life works like that? My wife is always texting me whenever I work my overnight shifts, telling me about all the crazy things happening in the house. I’m glad everything worked out for you in the end! We’re not all as comfortable as Macaulay Culkin in that situation!
Abigail says:
Ugh, being home alone is the worst. I swear the walls and everything else get microphones put in them when Joel leaves. They’re so LOUD. I’m not sure how it’s possible but it’s a fact of life.
Glad you have Mike back now. Hope that speeds up the healing process for both you and Annie.
Elle says:
I hated it when my husband would be away for work. I think I would practically leave every light on in the house when he was gone.
Steele says:
I’ve had to learn to be “home alone” for the past six years, since my husband is an OTR truck driver. In fact our six year anniversary is coming up in a few days, and we looked at each other and questioned, “Has it really been that long? It’ doesn’t seem like it.” We figured it was because out of the past six years, if you add up the time he’s actually home, it’s only about two years.
Extra locks are a beautiful thing. Reinforcing doors with longer screws are easy. Door braces are awesome. And of course door and window alarms help a bit, along with a video security system. And I sleep with the bedroom door locked with a door brace on it also. And if you really want to feel like a prisoner in your own home [sad I know] get security bars for your windows.
While I can’t stop someone from breaking in, I surely can slow them down with the security giving me time to call 911. Plus, I have a fire ladder in the bedroom, just in case I need to get out [whether it be burglary or a fire].
And if I can’t get out, well… I have a “friend” in the nightstand. Sometimes you have to decide if you are faced with such a situation what are you willing to do and how far are you willing to go to ensure that you and your family are protected if it comes down to a “us” versus “them” situation.
As for your doorbell ringing furiously [which sometimes is followed by someone knocking on the door] at that time of night, well.. this isn’t meant to scare you, but it’s a common way for “individuals” to force their way in. Don’t fall for it. If they yell it’s an emergency, yell back without opening the door you ARE calling 911 for them.
Based upon Rigby barking, I’d say someone was casing the house via the backyard to see who was home, figured you were home alone, and then rang the doorbell to get you to open the door.
It is unfortunate that we have to sometimes feel like we lock ourselves in a prisoner in our own home, but desperate times make people desperate, and desperate people commit desperate acts. Just be observant over the next few days. Turn on your outside lights [consider getting motion detector lights], and be vigilant if you open the garage door. I’ve know of home invasions that began when someone opened the garage door.
I’m not trying to scare you, I just want you and your family to be safe.
Kel says:
A friend in the nightstand……can’t even bring myself to say anything more than I assume you are in America. Please kept your friend there.
Amy Collen says:
A little judgmental there, aren’t you Kel? Steele was simply giving advice on how to protect yourself if you are home alone. Yes, she has a gun. I live in America too. So does Heather. When you make statements like that it’s insulting.
Steele says:
If you note, I did not advocate that everyone should have a gun in their nightstand. That is a personal choice, a freedom that people in the United States have. It is a personal choice that is not for everyone.
It is just like the choice a drugged crazed person or a simple thug has to not enter a home illegally…but unfortunately they do make that choice.
Obviously you do not live in the US, so please stop telling Americans what they can and can not do in their own home. And don’t tell me how to protect myself in my own home.
RzDrms says:
I like you, Kel, and I live in America.
Christian Left, FTW!
On another note, the only friend in my nightstand is the one bridging the “gap” between boyfriends….
Hiya!
Auntie_M says:
Lots of good advise! Especially the part about being observant over the next few days. Also, many people feel safe with the garage door being shut, but then forget to lock the house-to-garage door. In the town I lived in, in CA prior to moving to WA, there was a period of time where some thugs were driving around with universal door openers to the major garage door brands. If the door opened, they took what they could. I had a friend whose wife kept her keys in the ignition of her new SUV as well as her purse (& cell phone)–and they didn’t lock the door between the garage & kitchen. Fortunately the thieves contented themselves with simply steeling the car & its contents. They used the phone to make all sorts of international calls, chop-shopped the car, used the credit cards, etc–all before my friends woke up in the morning!
Steele says:
I’ve known people to actually shut off the power to the garage door opener when they are home for the evening to ensure that this does not happen to them.
However, there is still the emergency pull/latch that can be accessed by using a wire coat hanger through the top of the door. You place a zip tie around that so that they can’t disengage the pull and simply open your door. And if you need to use the emergency pull, you simply tug on the cord and the ziptie breaks. There are videos on YouTube of how to do this.
Also, if you ever need to change the locks on the door, spend the extra $10-20 to get a “bump” proof lock. Bump keys are easily made, and videos of how to make one can be found on YouTube. And you can choose to add a sliding lock on the inside of the door as extra protection against this.
And no, I’m not paranoid and no I don’t necessarily live in a bad part of town. It’s simply that criminals will attempt to find the weakness with your home to get in. Remember, thieves are opportunists. You give them that opporunity, they will take advantage of it. And I choose to not put myself in a situation where I could be a victim, and have to make the choice to get into the nightstand. That is a last resort.
Britt W says:
Hey Steele, um, I need you as my new best friend ASAP lol. My hubby is also an OTR driver, we’ve been doing this for 3 or 4 years now, and we have a 2 1/2 yo son. It just doesn’t get any easier does it? And, don’t let mcjudgey pants way up there get to you, as soon as we get the safe I want, you’re damn right I’m going to get a “friend” as well.
Steele says:
Honey, my other half is a truck driver, “mcjudgey” pants opinions don’t ruffle my feathers. I sleep well at night.
He’s been driving for over 23 years, 20 of that with the same company, nearly 2 million miles accident free with them. However, he’s probably not going to make it with them since miles have been cut from around 3000 a week to about 2200 a week…to about… 1000 a week.
He’s already pre-approved with another company, just has to schedule the orientation.
Lynn from For Love or Funny says:
Hope you both feel better soon!!
Sue says:
Super advice from Steele!!!!
Oh my gosh, Heather, did you ever find out who was at the front door? We want you to be safe! Gad that Mike is back!
Sue says:
Correction……”glad” that Mike is back
Mommy says:
Omg I am so scared right now. That doorbell thing would have given me a heart attack!!!
Just so I can sleep tonight, I’m going to tell myself that Rigby was barking at a raccoon or bunny in your backyard, and the doorbell was just some harmless teenagers trying to piss you off.
My hubby works nights right m
Mommy says:
Oops, hit submit too soon.
That was supposed to say, my hubby works nights right now, so he leaves around 5:00 and it is just me and the kids until 3:00 am. I get so freaked out sometimes! Having extra locks on all of the doors helps, and an alarm is always good too, as is a doggie, but like yours, mine sometimes sleeps through stuff she should be alerting me to. Having her warm body next to me does make me feel better though.
Anyway, I just wanted to say that I can relate to that feeling of panic and I am so glad your hubby is back!! Also, good for you for not answering the door!!!
Emily E says:
I hate being in a house alone at night. This is a house that is constantly settling, popping and cracking no matter the hour, but at night the same noises I ignore all day scare me. I don’t know what it is about being alone in a house that scares me more than being in an apartment.
I am the exact same way. My husband travels for business all the time. If I didn’t have a security system to keep me safe and a sound machine to drown out all those little bumps in the night, I would never sleep!
Mommy says:
I second the sound machine!! I can’t sleep without it!!
Tara says:
I feel your pain, I hate when Husband is on travel or just out for the evening and not home at a decent hour (before I fall asleep–which may or may not be within 10 minutes of our son’s bedtime). If it’s any consolation, I think the whole universe has been off for a few days now…everything is wacky. Hope you all feel better soon!
Jennifer says:
Do you have alot of preteens/teens in your hood? Ding Dong Ditching man. That could have been the culprit. I have 3 boys (2 teens). Its the new tp’ing…except our rules are they cant do random houses for fear of what could happen. They only DDD friends. (We have 16 kids of all ages on our entire street..lots of activity)
Heather P says:
That’s too funny… one time when my hubby was away for a night, THAT was the night someone decided to play “nicky nine doors”… Of course my son wanted to open the door, and I was upstairs cowering in his room. Mean teenagers scaring a grown woman.
Gina says:
Video security systems (with night vision) are getting cheaper every day and a pretty easy to install. Order one, ask Bampa to install in the back yard and at the front door.
That will give you ALOT of security to be able to see if there is anything there to be fearful of.
As for the front door bell – probably kids. Summer is upon us. Don’t panic – you did the right thing by not opening the door. But the camera system would have let you check and given you peace of mind.
Katrina @ They All Call Me Mom says:
The doorbell ringing with no one there would freak me out a bit. Definitely. Never, ever, ever answer a door when there is no one there! Yea, it could be Ding Dong Ditching… OR it could be something else. Always think “something else” just to be safe! Glad you hear you think like me
TamaraL says:
Poor thing!! I have no advice on the husband being away – I actually like having the house to myself!! – but I can commiserate on the sore throat. A sore throat brings me to my knees. Feel better!!
Leslie says:
I was the same way when my first was little. My husband worked on the road, he would be gone anywhere for 1 to 6 months at a time. I may have brought my 2 year old into my bed to “keep her safe” or really to keep me safe. After 4 years of that job I don’t get as scared as I used to, it does help that we moved to a small town. The worst was living in an apartment in the city where we had watched a gang fight and car burning a couple of weeks before right outside our front door, I never could sleep when we lived there.
Side note: I know you don’t know me at all, but I read your blog everyday. I had a crazy dream last night that I met you in the park with Annie. My kids recognized Annie first (they like to watch your videos) and we talked for quite a long time while Annie and my kids played at the playground.
Glenda says:
When I first got married and hubby had to work nights I slept on the couch. When we had our two little ones I put them to sleep with me. It sucks you have to act brave for the kids. Lol!!! Now the dog barks at night moreso when he’s at work. Thankfully we have an alarm. So it gets dark. I set it and lock myself in my room at night. Fun!!!
Rah says:
If Rigby doesn’t normally bark and was barking, I would have been on alert, too! If you get some bats in your attic, they will take care of the spiders. Just KIDDING! Talk to a USDA Extension agent and see if they recommend any way to deal wtih the spiders without chemicals that would affect the humanoids.
Pattie says:
I can relate. Whenever the spouse goes out of town, things at home fall apart. I’m talking large trees falling down and narrowly missing both our vehicles, power outages that last for days (we lost everything in the fridge the last time), illness — you name it. This past week was a relative cakewalk with Coraline throwing magnificent tantrums and only three power blinks.
Get well soon, and enjoy having Mike the Spider Killer home again!
liz says:
Our doorbell rang at 345 am a couple of weeks ago.. it totally freaked us out.. then it rang again at 8am, 5pm, 530pm.. turns out the battery was pooping out… sorry it scared you.. it might just be the doorbell malfunctioning..
Jessica says:
I would have been freaking out too and why is it that we feel that kids under the age of 5 can protect us? Hope you are feeling better!
Miriam says:
A house feels more exposed, I get it.
I would also consider an alarm, not necessarily the be all and end all, but it makes me feel safer when my husband is out of town.
m says:
I am the same way! In an apartment you’re surrounded by people! In a house it’s just you and the elements. Too much!
Carrie says:
My husband works night shifts and I HATE when he’s gone…although when he is home he snores so loud that I’m left to investigate every bump in the night anyway. One night I heard banging on the first floor and tried to wake my husband. He told me it was nothing and to go back to sleep. Shyeah right I have three kids, no way was I going to let this noise go unanswered for. I tiptoed to the first level of our house with a statue and found that the back door was wide open and the wind was banging it against the wall….
Another night I could hear someone in my kitchen (this time hubby was working) I grabbed a candelabra ( I know..I should get a weapon of some sort) and tiptoed to my kitchen. I turned the light on and started to scream at the intruder when my four year old promptly fell off the kitchen counter and took the pail of icecream with him…
Ive never actually come across a real intruder. Rest assured if I did they would be hit with whatever household decor I have at my disposal.
Crysi says:
My husband worked graveyard for 5yrs. Those first few months, every bump scared me half to death. He’s been on days for 18 months, but had to leave for training & only comes home on weekends for 16 weeks! I was a basket case too. And being in a house is so much scarier than an apartment, especially if you have a dog that barks over everything.
Auntie_M says:
Good girl for not opening the door when you didn’t see anyone thru the peephole! As for Rigby–I have to say, the 1st thing that popped into my mind was that Far Side cartoon where the one dog says to the other something like, “Watch what happens when I stand and growl at that empty closet.” But I’m guessing Rigby sensed something going on–whether is was a Ding&Ditch or someone casing your joint.
I think Steele had some great ideas. Also like the idea of video security systems. As for me, when I’m alone, I always feels safer if I can have the curtains closed so no one can see in at night! LOL–like that’s a form a protection (like pulling covers over one’s head!).
I wouldn’t recommend a “friend” for your nightstand unless you had training–and with a child in the house, I wouldn’t keep it in the nightstand but in a gun safe.
As for the spiders…how good is your aim with a rubber band? I dated a guy who wasn’t as fearless as one would want when it came to large spiders, but man! he had great aim with a rubber band! Dead center, legs flying everywhere. Added bonus: you don’t have to be anywhere near the spider & you can hit them off the ceiling!
Hope you & Annie are feeling better & glad Mike is home to protect his girls!
Meg says:
The men in our lives totally have the kill the spiders — it’s in the contract.
Meg says:
*To kill, that is. Sometimes my typing fingers get away from me!
Laura says:
I’m a total scaredy cat too and can’t help there… but spiders… Here’s a recipe for home made spider repellent. Get lemon, peppermint, lemongrass, and citronella essential oils and put six or so drops in a small squirt bottle that you then fill with water. I spray the doors, windows and around the places they hang out, like the eaves and the fence. I have only seen a few outside in the last three or four days where previously I would see at least three in the first five minutes outside. Reapply after rain or every few days.
cynthia says:
I am the same way. When my BF is gone overnight I take LOTS of extra precautions inside, and I leave the dog pens open in case anyone makes it over our fence. I like to think my 2 labs won’t sleep through an intruder.
Lanie says:
So gla that Mike is home. Hope everyone feels better soon. Take care .
andrea says:
So glad Mike is back home now…my only tip for spiders and any other type of bugs really is go and buy some spray to spray around the foundation of your house, and they will disappear. I was skeptical at first, but it really does work. I picked up Ortho Max (gallon jugs at walmart are like $5) Hope this helps! Oh and it lasts about 9 months before you have to re-apply it!
Rachel says:
I second the ortho max. We recently bought a house that was FULL of spiders. They didn’t bug me so bad but I think my poor husband was ready to move! He bought some ortho max and sprayed inside around the baseboards (the kind we got was for indoors, obviously ). I think we’ve seen maybe one since he sprayed? I know one is bad enough, but keep in mind we were seeing maybe TEN or more a day before the spray.
jess says:
I went from living at home with my parents to living in a second floor apartment. Now if I stay at home and hear the bumps and creaks? Yeah I get nervous. And I dog sit/housesit a lot and omg I am a nervous nelly! I housesat/dogsat at this HUGE home that could be described as a mansion and literally I spent 30 minutes going around locking and double locking doors and windows. I even locked my bedroom door there at night.
I’m glad there’s text msging and skype. I use it a lot when I do housesit and dog-sit! lol. I’m glad Mike is home!
btw I hate spiders too.
Expat Mom says:
My husband is a musician and is frequently away at night. The baby always goes bonkers and wakes up every hour when he’s gone, even though he sleeps like a log when Irving is here. Go figure.
My husband once asked me if it scared me to be home alone at night and it doesn’t . . . as long as I don’t go outside (our bathroom is outdoors, so that’s interesting). He told me that when I was out at night, he got totally spooked on his own. However, houses in Guatemala tend to have walls all around them, small windows, metal doors, etc.
The other day we were watching a movie and he said, “No wonder North Americans have so many horror movies, look at all those windows and the house is open to the street. ANYTHING could get in there! I’d be terrified to live there!” lol
I agree that a simple video security system is a good idea. It’s easy to install and will give you piece of mind. Also, brooms are really good for squishing spiders from a distance so they don’t jump on you. But I suggest teaching Annie to do it for you. My six year old son is an expert at killing giant spiders now.
RzDrms says:
A bathroom outside the house; that’d scare me.
I’ve been thinking a lot today, like over 17 hours, about Rigby barking like crazy but mostly the doorbell ringing and no one there. Super messed up. I’m so glad Mike is home.
Liz says:
My husband is in the military and currently deployed. We also happened to be overseas. I can relate. We joke in the military that everything breaks down as soon as our spouses leave. It’s crazy how true that is.