Last weekend a film crew came to our house to interview me for a documentary about prematurity. This film company was totally on the up-and-up (unlike say, SpohrTV, which is straight-up gorilla), so they went around to our neighbors to ask for permission to film (as required by the county). All I could think was, “Great! We are brand new to the ‘hood, and all our neighbors will know us as THOSE people!” I’m not sure what THOSE people means, but it sounds very labeled and misunderstood. The good news is that 100% of our neighbors OK’d the filming, so we are surrounded by laid-back cats. The more…interesting…news is that all the neighbors now have my blog address.
So hello neighbors! Yes, we are the ones that a film crew followed around the neighborhood last weekend. Yes, they brought a twenty-foot cargo truck with them. I’m sorry about that. On the plus side, some of your kids followed the film crew around, so perhaps they have new and exciting career aspirations!
Maybe you’ve walked by my house around 2pm, otherwise known in this house as “dance hour.” You probably can’t tell from the street, but our front room is totally empty. It’s the perfect space to blast music and dance around with my 19-month old. We also kick a soccer ball around in there. The fireplace is the goal, and my daughter is a TERRRRRRIBLE goalie. I score on her every time.
You should know that if you’re in the wrong place at the wrong time, you might see me naked. I’m not one that normally cruises around unclothed, but I often seem to find myself in situations where people see my private bits. Like yesterday morning, for example. I needed to dewrinkle a sundress, so I rolled into the garage where the dryer is. I accidentally hit the garage door opener instead of the light. I managed to stop the door after it had raised a few feet, but not before I shrieked like I’d just seen how many gray hairs were growing in my roots (SO MANY!). Since it was twenty minutes before school started, I’m pretty sure a few of you were walking with your kids on the sidewalk. Sorry about the impromptu learning experience!
If you come to my house, the odds of me having something delicious to eat are LOW. However, the probability of me making you a delectable drink is HIGH. Some background – I am a reformed party girl. After college, I worked at a bar, where I honed my drinking and hosting abilities. Once, I entered a beer drinking contest against a tourist from Samoa.
Now I have the occasional beer or glass of wine with a meal. But, I know what tastes good, and nothing would make me happier than to whip you up a tasty drink, dear neighbor! I have fruit trees in the backyard! Can I make you some sangria, or possibly a margarita with fresh limes? WHAT ELSE AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH ALL THIS FRUIT?!
In conclusion, I am available to walk your dog, grab your mail, and send my husband to feed your cats. I can’t do that, I’m super-allergic.
I just know we are going to be lifelong friends!
katrina @ They All Call Me Mom says:
Would you be mine? Could you be mine?
Won’t you be my neighbor!
> I’d LOVE it if the Spohr’s lived in MY neighborhood! <
nakedness and all, you'd make wonderful neighbors
I would love it if you were my neighbour! I just moved into my new house at the weekend and haven’t met a single neighbour! I haven’t even seem anyone in passing!
I saw the guy over the fence tinkering in his shed but when I said hello, he didn’t respond – super awkward!
The old couple on the other side spent all Saturday sneaking peeks out of their net curtains, but didn’t come out… *sigh*
My dreams of a desperate housewife style friendship network are slowly dying!
Aw, some other girls beat me to the punch, but I too was going to say that I WOULD LOVE to live next door to you, Mike, Annie and Rigby….but I doubt that you’re planning to relocate to Ohio any time soon.
Move to Maine! Move to Maine! Be my neighbor! It’s a little too cold for much of the year to have any real fruit trees, but have lots of grocery stores with limes!!
Hey! I’m in Maine too!
You sound like a fun neighbor!
This is too funny, lol!
When are you coming back to Greece?? I promise things are nice and calm now!
God, I want to be your neighbor!! My husband and I just moved to a new city 6 weeks ago and have yet to meet anyone who lives close by. No family around and we work far away You make me want to knock on people’s doors to see if any of them are as hilarious/fun/compassionate/awesome as you and your family seem to me! (This is my favorite blog I read by the way) But that might be creepy…
How should the rest of us go about meeting neighbors? (because I can tell you, no camera crews will be showing up at our house anytime soon…)
Dear Heather’s neighbors…I don’t know her personally but I just know she is going to be a fun neighbor!! I am jealous that you get to be her neighbor!!
I would love to have you guys as my neighbours!
Totally off topic — but I took my nephew to see the Spy Kids movie yesterday and did you fail to tell us about Annie’s acting debut? The baby in the movie looked a lot like Annie!
I would much rather have you for a neighbor than the up in age couple that my kids got to see fighting with a fence post…yes..fence post!
Hey Heather, I would totally love to have you as a neighbor. We moved about a month ago, and except for a hello over the fence about our cute but barking at each other dogs, I’m not making much progress on the meeting neighbors. But, unlike the last batch at least these don’t glare when we smile at them. That was just downright creepy!
Me either, we moved into our home at the end of may….I have seen the neighbors on each side of our house only a few times….I did manage to introduce myself once but they avoid eye contact so I cant even wave
My kids are having a tough time as well….the one neighbor that has a boy our sons age has for some reason decided my son is a bad kid and blames him for coloring on their house!!! WTH we tried to go talk to them about it and the “grandmother” (a lady not seeming to be much older than myself) was a real witch and said they were not available!
What do we do!?!?! Its not like we can up and move since we bought the home!!
I so wanted an adult friend because as a disabled stay at home mom I do not get a lot of adult interaction and I wish I had some friends!!!!
Awwwwwwww I LOVED this post it is so dang cute!!!! I WISH I was your neighbor!!!
I soooo wish I had you as a neighbor! And not just because you make delicious drinks…though, that is a plus. I have great neighbors on one side…the other side houses two old ladies that have very limited social skills. I mean, seriously, I have an adorable daughter…shouldn’t that make the old ladies love me?!
This makes me want to be your neighbor – we like a good dance party.
You are the cutest! I wish you were my neighbor!
Heather, you seriously crack me up!!!!!!! I love to sit and drink my morning coffee and giggle (and sometimes cry) at your posts!
Wish we could be neighbors… we would make great Desperate Housewife friends! :o)
I love this post! I don’t see any of your neighbors commenting, though. They’re missing out.
You guys sound like a lot more fun than my neighbors. If they read this post, they’d be cringing and whispering back and forth about the declining property values with the crazy people in the neighborhood.
heather’s neighbors- i can totally vouch for her drinks & her dancing! oh and also she’s hilarious!!
loved this post heather, joining everyone else in saying i wish i was your neighbor too
I’m sure they’ll adore you….just like we all do!!!
You are precious!
I needed a laugh today and the garage episode made me cackle!
If I ever move to Cali, I would love to have you as a neighbor.
I’m sure your neighbors are going to just love you guys!!
I need neighbors like you.
To my left is creeper Bob who sometimes fetches his paper in the nude under a very loose robe or at other times in his speedo & across the street is the crabby Walter Mathau look alike and act alike, Chuck who to calls to report you if you fart too loud or your grass is too high because OMG it”s 150 freakin’ degrees out Chuck. You mow my lawn!!
Anyways, yes, I desperately need neighbors who are cool like you please!!
I would be overjoyed if I knew that the Spohrs were moving into MY neighborhood. I would love to be looking out my front door, and seeing Miss Annabelle riding one of her cars down the sidewalk,,,,,seeing one of you taking Rigby for a quick walk… me walking by your house, and seeing a dance routine being taught to Annie, or maybe, just maybe, seeing that garage door going up unexpectedly. BUT most of all (even tho I have tons of work to keep me busy caring for our handicapped, adult son 24/7); I’d be there in a split second to give you unlimited hugs when you need them the most. In the meantime,,,your neighbors are going to love each and every one of you!
I wish I lived in your neighborhood, I could totally go for some sangria right about now
Give it for being reformed party girls!!! WOOOOOOOOO
For the record, when we moved into our house we decided to have a house warming party and the keg that was acquired for the party was neglected on our front stoop for sadly two weeks. Needless to say, It didn’t do much for our neighbors trying to sell their house. I suppose a large truck that left pretty soon after it came is not nearly as bad. The good news is that I, too, have reformed my ways. Now there’s probably a plastic tee-ball set on my front stoop
Here’s an idea I read about (I can’t take credit for it). This couple moved to a new neighborhood and after they were settled in a bit, they had a party and stuck invitations in everyone’s mailboxes on the street to come and bring an appetizer. People actually came and they met some of their best friends that way. Instead of waiting for the neighbors to welcome them, they were proactive and welcoming to the neighborhood.
I’m sure the neighbors were all happy just to see someone buy a vacant house! That neighborhood is lucky to have an awesome family like yours.
Hey, wait, is it too late to back out of your house? The one next to me is for sale! It even has peach trees!
Maybe I shouldn’t mention that it’s in Utah.
But I could really use a fruity drink!
LOL! You are awesome, Heather. LOVE that photo of you chugging that beer. =P
This is hilarious! I wish my neighbors were like you (not that they’re bad, but I live in a commercial area and the only couple is in their 60’s and nice, but we also don’t have lime trees growing in our back alley…).
Um, you sound like an awesome neighbor and I would totally re-live my youth and challenge you to a beer drinking contest that I know I would lose.
If it’s sangria, your guests can drink it, and then eat the fruit, which, to me, counts as food!
Wicked jealous of your neighbors.
You sound like such a fun neighbor to have You can move next door to me anytime, although I’m pretty sure your new house beats the condo for sale hands down.
Alexa @ A Life in Drive says:
This has got to be one of my favorite posts ever. You crack me up! I wish we lived next door to you, Mike, and Annie (and Rigby too)!