We just finished another round of doctor visits for Maddie. I just love spending beautiful late summer days in doctor’s offices, waiting areas, and x-ray rooms. Try to contain your jealousy.
Remember last week, when I was talking about how Maddie is going through a growth spurt that causes her to wake up every two hours to eat? Well, I know nothing. Since July 8th, Maddie has gained a whopping 2.8 ounces and a mere 1/4 of an inch in length. Oh, but don’t worry, her head is still growing right on target. Maddie is a bobblehead! Dr. Looove was perplexed by this development. We have to up Maddie’s caloric intake, and make sure she drinks at least 32 ounces of formula every day. We also have to feed her solids twice a day.
Mike likes having goals, so he is very focused on getting all that food into Maddie. Yesterday he got about 24 ounces into her, plus some pears. Today, Maddie turned to us and said, “yo dudes, I feel like a heffer. I am going on a hunger strike.” No solids, and far less formula. But hey, she’s sleeping more, so bonus. The other good news is that Maddie is right on target developmentally for her adjusted age. In some ways, she resembles a nine month old (she’s nine months old already! Crazy.) with the way she grabs things, follows people, etc. But physically she is still off the bottom of the adjusted chart.
We also had more moments with Dr. Lung that I will just treasure forever. Have I talked about how she is scared of me? I guess if you lose your temper enough on someone, they finally think, “hmm. I don’t think I can play my usual games with this mom anymore.” Mike is the good cop, I am the bad cop. It drives me crazy when Dr. Lung asks us what Dr. Looove has prescribed, only to say, “oh, no no, that isn’t good. You should do this instead,” and then changes doses, calories, etc. I’m sorry Dr. Lung, but Dr. Looove has been around longer than you. She visited Maddie in the NICU. She knows what’s up. You are making stuff up as you go along. I can’t wait for you to not be Maddie’s doctor.
Dr. Lung CAN NOT allow Maddie to have an appointment without some sort of test or procedure. This time, after examining Maddie, she decided we needed to have Maddie’s neck and face x-rayed. Why? Because Dr. Lung thinks Maddie may have enlarged adenoids. Uh, wha? Fine. Whatever. We spent FOR.EV.ER. in the radiology waiting area. My hair grew like four inches. Mike taught Maddie how to read and spell her name. I solved world hunger and still had time for a book of sudoku puzzles. FOR.EV.ER.
Have you ever tried to hold a baby still for anything? Like, really, really still. Oh, and that baby is only wearing a diaper, laying on a hard x-ray table, and you are wearing a very heavy led jacket to protect your delicate baby-making parts? It is like wresting an indignant pig slathered in baby oil, except I’m fairly certain a pig can’t scream with the same fervor as Madeline. We managed to hold Maddie still long enough for a “decent” picture, according to the x-ray tech, and then we decided to leave before the results were read. We couldn’t be in that waiting area any longer. If she has enlarged adenoids, we will probably have to see an Ear Nose & Throat doctor. Yay, another doctor!
I think my favorite part, though, was when Maddie peed all over Dr. Lung’s scale. I’d been considering a similar move myself, but I think if I’d peed on Dr. Lung’s computer I would have been sent to the psych ward.
Our daughter had to have her wrist x-rayed at 13 months, and I made her Dad hold her. It was like the loudest wrestling match you can imagine! Very stressful too. And what is it about taking a PICTURE that takes so damn long? Is there like some requirement that the younger one’s child, the longer the wait in radiology? Sheesh….
Hope the evil Dr. Lung has no need to see your Maddie much more.
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I hear you on the having to hold a baby still thing. We have to do it every couple of days to replace Erin’s tape *le sigh*.
Dr lung, what a gem. *shakes head* I’d probably pee on her computer too.
Have you thought of adding extras to her formula to boost the calories?
laurie feldman says:
Two weeks after my daughter, Isabelle, was born, she spent a week in the NICU. Her irregularly shaped blood cells caused her to have severe jaundice that could only be cured by a complete blood transfusion. Once this was performed, six months of tests ensued to determine the cause.
Thank GOD the cause was a fluke- her newborn cells, which returned after six months were shaped properly, unlike her fetal blood cells, which caused her to be a sick newborn.
Anyway, during that time I met a lot of moronic doctors. Our former pediatrician, first and foremost, who told me day after day, before she realized that no, her jaundice wasn’t getting any better, that my baby was fine, when I knew that she was not. The day that we had to rush her to the neonatal unit, that pediatrician sent me home without the results of all Isabelles blood work. “GO home and enjoy your healthy baby, she said.” The minute I walked back in the door, she was on the phone. “Oops, I mean rush her to the ER immediately so the severe jaundice doesn’t damage her brain.” I swear to GOd.
This is turning into an entire post, and I’m sorry, but I can relate. Next time maybe you should pee on the Doctor’s computer, from what I have heard the psych ward isn’t such a bad place. At the very least, they would give you good drugs.
Oh no! Poor Maddie and you guys!
I hope everything turns out ok. I couldn’t imagine trying to hold a baby still for an xray. My 6 month old won’t even hold still for a diaper change.
I think they teach doctors in med school that THEY MUST DISAGREE WITH EACH OTHER. It is so aggravating. Awful. I guess eventually, you just learn to go with your gut, and hope you’re right.
So sorry Maddie’s not gaining. Good luck. I can’t imagine trying to get her to eat so much. None of my babies ever ate 32 ounces of formula, and my oldest was 9lbs. 6 oz. when he was born. That sounds overwhelming to me.
I hope you’re being as good to yourself as you can right now. I can’t fathom the stress that you’re under.
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moosh in indy. says:
I would have brought you an medal (sans ribbon necklace, you know, so you didn’t hang yourself) to the psych ward.
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Anna Marie says:
ARGH. Infant x-rays are the worst. And since EVERYONE loves unsolicited advice, I was going to say the same thing as Bec – when Emmie had a hard time gaining weight I boosted her formula to 24 cals. I also mixed the powdered formula into stuff like applesauce and bananas to sneak some extra calories in.
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Maybe Mike needs to puree some of those french fries for Maddie. They sure seem to add pounds to my butt!
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Mary Beth says:
Dr. Lung sounds like a douche! Good for Maddie – pee away honey! Good that you chose to solve world hunger during your down time – always thinking of others (sigh).
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Fiesty Charlie says:
I am retired from the medical field and have dealt with many, many doctors!
I hope you no longer have to deal with Dr. Lung very soon! She is being unprofessional at least and dangerous by doing what she is doing. She should be pulling out the phone for a conference right then and there if she disagrees with the dosage or treatment plan. All doctors do is confuse parents and risk the health of the kids.
It is good you and Mike are on the ball with Maddie, because I have seen parents actually overdose their kids because they got confused in the middle of the night, by conflicting orders. The kids ended up being OK after a day or two in the hospital, but it could have been avoided by a simple conference call with the doctors.
If you really want to “pee on her scale” you might suggest a conference call with Dr. Love and put her on the spot with her dissenting and conflicting opinion the next time she does it. You and Mike should be on the call. It would be an interesting blog… eh?
You two really are some of my every day heroes! I love you blog and thank you for sharing your family with me here in the cyberworld.
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:0) I had an awesome comment in my head at the top of your post, but by the time I got down to the bottom, all I can think of is this:
My nephew is 4. He’s 9 months older than Dylan, is a good 5 inches shorter and a good 5 pounds lighter. Reason he’s such a mini? Enlarged adenoids. They were JUST removed last week, so hopefully he’ll start putting on weight and growing in the next few weeks/months.
It used to make me feel like Dylan was somehow “slow” because he was so much bigger than his cousin, but was nowhere near him developmentally. It was funny. And sad.
My point is, if the adenoids are enlarged, they could definitely be inhibiting Maddie’s growth. AND, Zach has an unusually large head (95% while the rest of him hovers around 50%), so our future grandkids are going to be complete freaks of nature.
Had a near pee-in-pants moment over your waiting room W.A.I.T.
And I just wrote a book about our experiences with a Dr. E.R. Lung and our Little Miss’ itsy bitsy teeny weeny lungs when she wasn’t even 2 months old. Since it was too long for a mere comment ici, I figure I’ll just make a post of it!
Does Maddie snore? I mean, is it common enough for a Dr. Lung to assume she’s got some baseball sized adenoids? I know she loves baseball, but I think she’ll sport them you guys just yet! She’s just a pre-tot. And she smiles A LOT!
OOPS! I meant to say:
I know she loves baseball, but I DON’T think she’ll sport them for you guys just yet!
instead of what I said up top… proofreading helps!
i LOVE that she peed on the doctor’s scale.
she many be pint-sized but she’s one smart cookie
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Dude, I love the mental picture of you peeing on her computer. Seriously, I’m in a FOUL mood and that thought? Made me laugh. Thanks, dude.
Pee away sister. I’ll visit you in psych.
Sorry Maddie and you are going through all of this, but it certainly does make for hilarious blog fodder, especially since you retell the stories so well!
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I recall the nightmare of taking Jack for MRIs. And I always wondered, don’t these people specialize in doing these procedures? Haven’t they had to do them on children before? Why am I coming up with all of the brilliant procedures on how to get a child through it?????
Go Maddie. You show them who can pee with Olympic precision!
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Andrea's Sweet Life says:
Maddie is already well on her way to her own medical degree, I think. Shouldn’t she be getting college credits for this?
You should’ve peed. LOL. despite the hassles of all this you guys keep your sense of humour – awesome.
Oh joy! More fun. Not.
I don’t like Dr. Lung. Not at all. She’s sounds like a pretentious bitch who must “one – up” someone else. I would like to pee all over her scale. I got an idea: You hit the computer and I’ll hit the scale and Mike can cause a diversion and we can run out of there. I live near a place that I can get costumes! We can go in as Obama and McCain or something. LOL!
Chin up dear. Time will heal all.
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I had to hold my couple week old babe for an x-ray of his head. Yeah, that was simple. WHATEVER. Maddie sounds like such a champ through all of this! Dr. Lung – I roll my eyes at her and spit in her coffee.
pgoodnesss last blog post..meh
Take that, Dr. Lung!! Love it!