Mike and I have our fair share of experience telling people that a new Spohr baby is on the way. This last time, we had told our family and had just started to tell friends when we found out the baby miscarried. But that’s not the point of this post. Circumstances being what they were, Mike and I were usually together when we told people a baby was on the way, and we discovered that we had very different ways of making the announcement. So different, in fact, that we are still arguing about it. May I now present to you our two sides, without stating who says what (for fairness, obviously).
Technique Number One: We’re pregnant!
Pro: We are married, and the man is supporting the woman through the entirety of the pregnancy (emotionally, with food runs, etc). It’s his baby too and he deserves credit for helping to grow said child.
Against: Men can never literally be pregnant. To say otherwise makes people think of a crappy Arnold Schwarzenegger movie. A man certainly deserves credit for helping bring a baby into the world, but until men have uteruses (uteri?), men cannot claim pregnancy as a state of being.
Technique Number Two: We’re Expecting/Having A Baby!
Pro: This includes the husband and the wife in a happy, positive, equal way while avoiding the biological impossibility of a man being pregnant. This does not demean the man’s role or ignore how hard it is to literally be pregnant.
Con: The man isn’t just sitting around waiting for the baby, he is doing his part to help the baby grow by caring for and helping the mom with her needs. Saying, “we’re expecting,” is just splitting hairs.
So which do you prefer to hear or say? This is a very heated discussion around these parts.