I didn’t take Annabel to the emergency room last night. Mike and I discussed it at length, and we decided that if her condition got any worse, we’d take her in immediately. It didn’t, and luckily we all managed some sleep. It might have helped that I had her sleeping ON me. Who that helped more, I’m not sure.

Dr. Looove, our family doctor, checked her over for everything. She could tell Annie is very congested and working a bit harder to breathe, but luckily her lungs were clear. Her cough is being caused by her nasal congestion leaking back into her throat (ew). She does have fluid on her ears, which explains the head shaking she started doing a couple days ago. Dr. Looove said her ears feel clogged because of that.

Because Dr. Looove is awesome and anticipated my every question, she also arranged for a pulse ox test. This checked to see how much oxygen Annie was getting into her blood stream. I flashed back to the last time I sat in a chair in Dr. Loove’s office with Maddie during a pulse ox test. Maddie’s number was in the 60s (bad) and that’s what lead to the ambulance taking her to the hospital. Annie’s test took a while to read accurately. The first numbers that came up? In the 60s. I don’t know how I didn’t fall out of my chair – especially because it took a while for the numbers to regulate. Finally, they settled at 94.

We have strict observation, fluid intake, and rest directions. If her cough doesn’t go away in a couple days, she needs to be brought back in. Dr. Looove assured me that Annie will be OK, and I know this. But there is still that little part of me that is totally freaked. When my normally rambunctious baby wants to snuggle and be held, something is wrong.

The whole experience has reminded me that my children can’t live in a bubble, but I sure wish they could. I am the mommy and I’m supposed to protect my girls and keep them from harm’s way. I failed with Maddie. I don’t like the reminder that I could with Annie. I don’t like the universe throwing a big, “don’t forget you really have no control!” message in my face.

I might start constructing a bubble, just in case.