I’ve made a lot of bad decisions in my life: Driving too fast near the police academy, the times I chose to anything else instead of my homework, or when I ran up thousand dollars of credit card debt when I lived in New York City (just to name a few). But those are boring. I want to talk about the really dumb life decisions. Like the stupidest thing I ever did to my eyebrows.
I had somewhat-thick eyebrows when I was a kid/teen.
In high school a friend took me under her wing to teach me about makeup. At one point she gently suggested I pluck my eyebrows, but I was uninterested because it hurt. I went to college with my little caterpillars, and there my roommate was like, “Roommate…we have to do something about your brows.” Then what felt like the entire floor of the dorm descended on me with tweezers. Still, the results were great…and I literally let those girls pluck my eyebrows the entire year.
Sophomore year I came back with insanely overgrown eyebrows, and I no longer lived with any of my Freshman Year Aestheticians. But see, I was cocky. I was like, “I got this.” I grabbed some tweezers, walked to the bathroom, and started plucking…and plucking…and I was like, “What is this whole section here? I don’t need this.” I literally removed the outer half of my eyebrows.
There are no photos of me from this dark time, but I have created a dramatic reenactment for you.
This is just a tribute.
When I was done, I walked back toward my room. Jackie! was walking in the opposite direction, and when she saw me, she grabbed my shoulders and said, “OH MY GOD WHO DID THIS TO YOU?”
My tweezers were taken away. Growing back eyebrows? NOT FUN. Sixteen years later, my eyebrows still haven’t fully recovered, but now I only let professionals touch them.
I used to have a unibrow, but years of plucking and Nair-ing have completely destroyed the place where my eyebrows met, which is good, but I’ve also lost the beginning 1/3 of my brows, which is not so good Now I don’t do much to pluck them at all, except to keep the fuzzy area above my nose clean.
WHY IS BEAUTY HARD???
Sara Mc. says:
My youngest sister decided to take a razor to her brows. Whoa! Bad decision. She ended up shaving off half of them. The full part, so for the longest time she looked continually surprised. It was awesome.
*Those* are semi-thick? Oh dear, if they ever saw mine, heh!
Eyebrows are so tricky. I’ve been scared of letting anyone pluck mine not out of fear of pain, but of fear of someone getting over eager and deciding to do ‘just a bit more…oh, you can fill that spot in’. It’s also a matter of personal taste.
And yes, I know people who never grew their eyebrows back; I’ve seen one longer than the other on someone when they didn’t wear makeup (I mean, like 1/2 inch or more difference!) I’ll probably keep my thick brows; I think they suit me anyways.
I . . . did exactly the same thing in middle school. To a T. Which meant I had to go through many of my school years with tiny, tiny eyebrows (my dad called them “exclamation points”) and learn how to actually care for my brows! I tweeze them myself now, but I do so with caution. And a light hand!
Liz T. says:
I have had my eyebrows shaped for over 20 years. Unibrow be gone. However, the last couple of months I have noticed they are turning gray and they are hard to see. So yesterday, at my hair appointment, I had my hairdresser dye them. Just one more thing to up keep, but I have my brows back…for a while.
I agree with Susan…if that top photo is your unplucked eyebrows, they look great to me! I am fortunate to have pretty light eyebrows and no unibrow, but mine go everywhere when left to their own devices. So in high school, my best friend decided I needed to start plucking. She tried to do it, and I freaked out. I could not stand just sitting there and letting her inflict little jabs of pain. So, we had this ritual where she would basically sit on my hands and hold me down while plucking. What are friends for?
Then a few years later, I discovered waxing, and that worked for awhile until I started breaking out every single time. Trying different waxes didn’t help. By the time the breakouts healed, it would almost be time to wax again. So I started plucking on my own. I do not have the pain tolerance or the artistic skills to have beautifully shaped, model-quality eyebrows. But I like to think they’re passable.
Also, I realized after I began waxing that nobody, especially not boyfriends and male friends, could tell the difference between the before and after without being prompted.
I recently discovered my 10 year old daughter (yes, I said 10) had plucked her own eyebrows because some mean 4th grade girl told her she had a unibrow! UGH! Needless to say, it’s not a good look, but it could be worse. I have since hidden my tweezers.
I used Nair on my eyebrows as a freshman in high school. I was trying to “shape” them, but went a little overboard and ended up with only half of one eyebrow. (The other one looked great!) Luckily, this was in the 90’s when those bang pieces that hung down into your face were in style – and it grew back!
I am an eyebrow “snob”. I started getting mine done freshman year of college after a friend of mine suggested it. I have been doing it ever since and feel ugly when they’re not done. One time I tried shaving them thinking it would save on money and pain. Good God, don’t do that. Have you tried threading?
I look back at pictures and can’t believe how long I went with two COMPLETELY DIFFERENT SHAPES of eyebrow and nobody told me. My mom taught me how to pluck when I was maybe 12? but I had no idea what I was doing and just kinda went with it. Finally now at 25 things are evened out but damn. Thanks, friends for the heads-up, NOT.
Ha! Love it! Every time I try to do my own the professionals say “uh, have you been trying to do this on your own?”. Needless to say I don’t try any longer. I think it’s one of those skills that you either have or you don’t!
I once had an eyebrow blunder. In middle school I was in the shower shaving my legs and went to scratch my eye with razor in hand. Some how I nicked the middle part of my eyebrow to where I had eyebrow…bald spot…eyebrow. My dad called it an eyebrow gap. I was so mortified I didn’t tell anyone but my mom (who laughed hysterically because she had had an eyebrow mishap as a teen). Needless to say, I could fill it in with some eyeliner but I didn’t go into the pool all summer for fear of my secret brow gap being revealed!
A few months ago, I split my eyebrow pretty badly by smashing into my bathroom door for no apparent reason (seriously, I wasn’t even coming out of the shower; no wet floor or anything; just slipped). The upside? I hit it in exactly the area that I used to have to do the most plucking and now … well, I must have killed some nerve endings or something because there has been no need for any tweezing. The trade-off is a light scar but hell, I’ll take make-up over tweezers or wax any day of the week.
I was always told I had perfect eyebrows. I never got it until I got well into my 30s and people starting asking me where I got my brows done so they could go. I have never touched them. While I am far from over body image issues, I am thankful for my awesome eyebrows!
My husband has many extra crazy professor eyebrows that you can have FOR FREE.
The other day my nine year old asked if she could pluck her eyebrows. She’s NINE. I kept my cool and I calmly told her “No. There is no need. You barely have anything to pluck. Don’t start that stuff right now. Wait until you are older.” and at the end of all that, I added the most important reason: “Besides, you should wait until you can afford to have them professionally done!”
I still remember bjones talking about Anastasia! Best beauty advice (aka ONLY beauty advice) my mother ever gave me: Don’t overpluck your eyebrows. I seriously thank her for doling out that advice during the height of 90s waif minimalist madness.
I like my caterpillars but I do try and tame them a little now and then! P.S. I like the Tenacious D reference.
That is my favorite GIF of all time, ever! I will be laughing about that one for weeks. And then, to throw in, “This is just a tribute.”? Genius. Thanks for the laugh.
I’m glad Jackie!’s name has her exclamation mark back. From what you’ve wrote about her, I think she would love that.
One word: THREADING!! One more word? AMAZING!!!! Give it a shot…