Annie gets weird ideas in her head. A couple of weeks ago she started asking me for a “practice dog.” In Annie-Speak, practice means pretend. So when she asked me for a practice dog I responded, “What on earth do you need a pretend dog for? You have a real dog.” Then my friend Lissa came over this past weekend, and she coincidentally brought Annie this:

Annie and Archie

That’s Archie. Do not make the mistake of asking Annabel if Archie is a boy or a girl because she will murder you with her eyes. Archie is girl dog. As you can see, Archie looks a lot like another dog we know and love:

Archie and Rigby

Rigby is lukewarm on Archie (Rigby is lukewarm on most things). Annabel loooooves both of her dogs.

Archie, Annie, Rigby

The problem with Archie is that she looks exactly like Rigby from above:

Rigby and Archie

To add to this, Annie leaves Archie all over the place, which is an accident waiting to happen. Archie has been in my path more times than I can count. I always see her out of my peripheral vision, and then I usually jump or contort my body to make sure I don’t step on what I think is Rigby. I have several Archie-related injuries from avoiding the stuffed dog. One of these days I’ll remember that Rigby gets out of the way; Archie does not.

The other night, I woke up to feed James. I left Mike and Rigby in bed, and when I walked into the hallway, this greeted me:

Archie will haunt your dreams

One of my Archie-related injuries is a heart attack, because OMG TOY INEXPLICABLY ALONE IN A DARK HALLWAY AFTER MIDNIGHT. I might never recover.