You all are so nice to compliment Mike and me. But really, I am putting the best possible pictures up here. Believe me. It’s my blog, so I get final cut. Although, when I was looking through my 5 billion flickr photos, I found a few that almost made the cut, but were just edged out. Like this one:
It never occurred to me that you would want to see a picture of the drag queens. Here are my gorgeous queen friends posing with my old roomies Jackie and Bella. This picture is from Halloween 2002, which is why Bella has on a snake skin hat and Jackie has a bone in her hair. I’m taking the picture (I was dressed as a sexy nurse, let your imaginations run wild), but I would be doing all of you a disservice if I didn’t point out that the wigs, earrings, and other embellishments are all made of feminine products. Click on the picture for a closer look.
Ginger wasn’t my maid of honor because I didn’t have a maid of honor – I had a Matron. Splitting hairs, I know. My Matron of honor was my bestest friend in the whole world, Tara. We’ve known each other since we were two years old, and we were lucky enough to grow up three houses away from each other. As hot as Ginger and Ginger’s friend are, Tara is way hotter – and 100% woman. Tara is the bomb, and I’m not just saying that because I indirectly implied that a drag queen would have been a better honor attendant than her. No, I’m just saying it because it needs to be said. And also, Tara knows way too much about me for me to ever let her be mad. She has more dirt on me than the Scientologists have on Katie Holmes. I love Tara!
Maddie had a busy day today. My parents picked her up at the crack of dawn to take her to the Catholic Girls High School by their house. One of their best friends is the religion teacher there, and she had her students pray for me and Maddie every day we were in the hospital or I was on bed rest – we’re talking 140 days of praying here. Today was their last day of school, so my mom brought Maddie in so the girls could meet her. I forgot how baby-obsessed teenage girls are. My mom said the squealing was insane, and several of the teenage girls said, “I want a baby NOW!”
In related news, 27 nuns simultaneously fainted dead away in a Los Angeles Suburb.