Last week an occupational therapist called to see if Maddie and I were available for an feeding evaluation on the 26th (yesterday). When I said we were, she told me she’d confirm with the Regional Center and call me back. And then I never heard back from her…until yesterday…at SEVEN A.M. I was so pissed I could spit, so the OT should consider herself lucky Mike is the one that answered the phone.
The OT never heard back from the Regional Center, but she still came, which I found really odd. And, because she never heard back, she had NO information on Maddie. She didn’t even know why Maddie was getting a feeding evaluation! I had to spend 45 minutes going over Maddie’s medical history. These appointments only last an hour, so I was kind of annoyed that the bulk of it was spent giving her information she should have had when she arrived at my house.
My dad had a lunch near my house today, so he came over so he could help dog wrangle during the evaluation. I’m glad he was able to come, Mike and I are up a dog (we’re watching my pal’s dog while she’s out of town), and Maddie got really bored really fast with all the sitting and talking. I was also glad to have another set of ears, as I was expecting her to give me a lot of information and advice. And while she did give me some ideas, foods, and tricks to try, she also gave me a big helping of attitude with a side of judgment.
Seriously, I was so glad my dad was there to hear it, because I think if I wrote about one more person being rude to me you all would start to really wonder what my deal is. Believe me, my dad would tell me if I deserved it. To be fair to this woman, I think she was extrememely frustrated with the whole system. But to be fair to me, I am frustrated with the system, too, and I was nothing but polite.
She would ask me questions like, “what are you feeding Maddie?” and then interrupt me during my answers. When I said I was giving Maddie organic baby food she said, “and you’re making it yourself?” When I said no, she said, “Why not?” I wanted to say, “LADY, I have bugs in my flour, ok? I don’t cook.” Instead I just said, “I don’t have the time, but she loves the food in the jars.” Then she rolled her eyes at me! It took everything in me not to laugh. I mean, seriously. I am just not the mom that has the drive or time to make baby food. The moms that do are awesome, and I’m sure they don’t have the drive or time to do something else that comes more naturally to me. This parenting stuff is all give and take.
She’d ask if I was giving Maddie certain foods. Some were foods I gave, some were good ideas, and some seemed like strange foods to give a baby with five teeth. Like potato chips, or pizza crusts. After hearing the list of foods Maddie eats she exclaimed, “You don’t give her anything chewy!” I said, “no, not really, on account of the five teeth and all. I give her crunchy stuff and that’s hard enough for her to break into pieces.” The OT would then purse her lips and go, “hmmmm.” I could really go on and on, but this woman just rubbed me the wrong way.
After the question and answer portion, the OT spent about eight minutes playing with Maddie, and another seven minutes watching her eat. And that was it! She said someone would contact me in the next couple of weeks, and then took off. Once she left, my dad and I laughed about it. Like I said to my friend Leslie, I am self conscious and uncertain about a lot of things, but I never doubt my ability to mother Maddie. It would take a lot more than eye rolls from a stranger to shake my confidence in that department. We’ll see what happens with the feeding therapy – assuming this woman decides Maddie needs it.
After the OT left, my dad, Maddie and I walked to Dr. Looove’s office so Maddie could have her monthly RSV vaccine. My dad stayed in the waiting room and he could hear Maddie screaming in the exam room! She just does NOT like to be weighed. As soon as I strip her down, the shrieks and waterworks start. But this time, I didn’t care. Why? Because in the last month, Maddie has gained a POUND AND A HALF! She now weighs 16 lbs 7 oz. I made the nurse weigh Maddie again just to be sure. A pound and a half! In a month! SUCK IT feeding specialist!!!!
Lee Anne says:
If it makes you feel any better, I made my daughter’s food and she didn’t eat much of it. When I switched to Earth’s Best she ate like a maniac. I wasted sooo much time, money and energy…
Yay for 1.5 lbs!
A pound and a half? Go Maddie…pretty soon you’re gonna have to re-name your blog Maddie’s Multiplying! Good luck with the OT…she’s sounds like a pleasure!
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Ms. Moon says:
Yes. Obviously you are doing something right. Congratulations on the enormous baby you have there!
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A pound and a half, that’s awesome!!! Apparently you are making at least a few good choices in the food department.
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A pound and a half? Yea Maddie!!!
What a butt head. Seriously. Not a dam thing wrong with jarred baby food. Sheesh, people need to get a life. I’ve not made any baby food myself and I’m on kid number three. Dude, the third ear is a bit odd, but they made due.
Domestic Extraordinaire says:
very excited for Maddie’s weight gain. So sorry you got to deal with another dork.
Domestic Extraordinaires last blog post..Still alive
Ack! The horror! You feed that sweet girl baby food from a JAR?! What kind of mother are you?! With all of the great options in baby food out there today you should feel no guilt. That sort of judgement makes me nuts. It’s not her job to judge. Yes, if you were feeding Maddie peanut brittle and taffy for dinner, but jarred baby food? Sheesh.
Great for Maddie and her weight gain! Woo Hoo! You are obviously doing something right!
Poor Heather…I think you have a jerk magnet stuck to your back…ask Mike to check that out for ya
Yeah, some one was telling me how easy it is to make your own food for your baby and I just politely nodded my head and smiled while thinking, it’s also easy to open a jar and she likes it and it’s just as good for her so there! <—-mentally sticking my tongue out like a 5 year old. You’re a great momma,just look at that happy girl who GAINED a pound and a half in the past month.
only you know whats really best for Maddie.. you are obv doing something right if she gained a pound and a half! woot woot!
mayas last blog post..Rock on DJ. Rock on.
You should’ve informed her that the March of Dimes is held in high esteem, and they wouldn’t choose a moron to represent them! Mother’s always know best and really…doesn’t the OT have any real work to do?! She showed how insensitive she was right at the start calling at 7am. The nerve of her. Way to go on the weight gain!
Wow! A pound and a half! Goooo Maddie!
Apparently, the poor child hasn’t been stunted by her evil mother’s wicked used of *gasp* jarred baby food. *eye roll* Sheeesh. How ridiculous that woman is. Make it, buy it, as long as it is good for babies and helps them grow, SHE SHOULDN’T CARE.
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Patti B. says:
First off – yeayyy Maddie (and parental units!!!) and secondly – I’m glad you put that chick on your SUCK IT list because if you hadn’t, I sure was going to!!!! People are freaking nuts. Gahhhh!
Just thought I would share that I just clapped (yes, out loud) at my desk when reading of Maddie’s awesome weight gain. I’m glad my boss isn’t here today. I’m not sure the explanation of “I’m clapping because some stranger on the internet just reported that her daughter, who was born premature and has difficulty gaining weight, gained 1.5 pounds this month” would go over well when I should be working…
Yay for Maddie! I’m so happy she gained that weight. As for that woman? Screw her. She needs to go see her protologist cuz I think her sphincter is too tight! I never made baby food for my boys. Hell, I was barely able to warm a bottle let alone do all that other stuff. You’re doing fine Heather – don’t let anyone ever make you second guess yourself.
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Congrats to Maddie! And to you for feeding her food she obviously likes!
I don’t understand why people like that go into a profession that has to deal with kids or with parents who already have enough to deal with. I hope there’s a way for you to provide feedback on her. She does not need to be doing that job. Regardless, I hope you get the feeding therapist recommendation (if you think Maddie needs it) and hope that the therapist will actually be a kind, normal human being.
punkinmamas last blog post..remaining balance
My favorite thing about you (though, admittedly, I am a stranger who just loves to read your blog) is exemplified by this: “I am self conscious and uncertain about a lot of things, but I never doubt my ability to mother Maddie. It would take a lot more than eye rolls from a stranger to shake my confidence in that department. ”
Seriously, that is an awesome thing to think and to say out loud. I don’t think enough of us mothers feel like that. Can you bottle your confidence and sell it to us? You’d make a fortune. I guess I just think you’re right, that you *do* seem to do a great job being Maddie’s mom… so I like that you can see that about yourself. Pretty freaking cool.
And very freaking cool about Maddie’s weight gain. My daughter has faced none of the challenges Maddie had, but still wasn’t a big eater and steadily dropped down the charts from the time when she was 6 weeks old until last month (18 months). Then somehow in the last six weeks she gained TWO POUNDS and now shot up the charts again. It is weird. Are our kids just trying to prep for swimsuit season, trying to get that adorably plump baby belly or something?
You don’t make her baby food? You’re a disgrace.
I kid, I kid.
I had a similar experience with an EI evaluator. She was a fucking bitch.
ms. changes pants while driving says:
stupid OT chick.
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Becky Mochaface says:
Are you a bitch nugget magnet? Because you seem to just attract them.
Becky Mochafaces last blog post..Grey’s Anatomy S5ep17
This system is full of losers. Remember the woman who came to my house when Sadie was only five months and thought I should just be feeding her Kool Whip to fatten her up? Yeah, you may have to go through a few people before you find one you like. You’re allowed. And no one’s EVER said a word about me not making baby food. WTF? Um, also, 16.7???? That’s awesome. Sadie and her tube are 16.14. They are basically twins!!
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Yay for the pound and a half. The baby food thing is kind of dumb.
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Can you come and feed Erin? I’d kill for a 1.5lbs gain.
Have you thought about complaining about the OT? That’s so incredibly rude. I used to make Erin’s food but she hated it. Like with a total passion. She was much happier to eat food from a jar, it’s only now that she’s eating table food that she’s even begun to appreciate my bad cooking.
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Bugs in your flour. HA. I wonder how long it would have taken you to figure it out if I hadn’t said anything. HA.
And YAY Maddie!
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moosh in indy. says:
I could come over and judge your parenting for free. I’d never even bill you insurance. In fact there’s a whole internet to judge you parenting for free, why even bother with the middle man?
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cindy w says:
I have never made baby food in my life. I wouldn’t know how. For chrissakes, I don’t even own a cuisinart. What a stupid woman. She missed her calling, she clearly should’ve been a lactation consultant. (Um, did that sound bitter?)
When Catie was about a year old, I was hanging out with a friend of mine who has 3 kids. She offered Catie a chicken nugget. I freaked. “Choking hazard!!” She only had 3 teeth, after all. But my friend was right. They can chew a lot more than you’d think, even without molars.
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I mix bananas and cereal and milk/formula together in a bowl and then I say I made baby food.
Also, I can’t wait to hold Maddie on Sunday. I hope I don’t drop her since she weighs much more since the last time I saw her!
i make baby food, i buy baby food. it just depends on what suits and what they eat. some things are so easy if you can get your kid to eat them: banana and avocado spring to mind. ah but judgemental people can really undermine mums. good to hear you just got annoyed and don’t question yourself.
Joe @ Irrational Dad says:
You should contact the people on Discovery Health that do the “Mystery Diagnosis” show. There’s got to be something wrong with you that makes you attract rude people. You should look into that.
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Way to go, Maddie! Can’t wait to see you soon
Andrea's Sweet Life says:
Way to go! That is SO FREAKING AWESOME!
I was one of those moms who made her own baby food, but I certainly never held it against other moms who didn’t. I love to cook, so like you said, I had the drive and the time to do it. From how you describe her, I think that lady must not have any kids of her own!
Andrea’s Sweet Lifes last blog post..Beans With a Side of You Don’t Wanna Know
i made homemade baby food once. and it involved a banana and a fork.
alis last blog post..last things first
Heather — My Catie was a preemie also and had the whole skinny thing going on. At one year old Catie weighed 8 pounds! We thought she was so big a the time —- and from where she came from she WAS big!!! Her teeth didn’t start coming in until she was 16 onths old — part of her bone disease. One thing I found that she could gum around and liked was a McDonald’s cheeseburger! Tear it into little bites and try it! Catie loved it! Oh, and the fries…….or was the me?!
congrats on a pound and a half. my 8 month old lost the same amount a month ago b/c she was super sick and refused to eat. she’s slooooooooooowly putting it back on.
We have had all the tons of weight gain issues with Brooklyn too, and 16 lbs, 7 oz is exactly what she weighed at her 1 yr checkup! Woohoo! Of course, she still weighed the same on Friday at her pulmonologist – 2 1/2 weeks later – but it’s still progress. I know how you feel Go Maddie!