Other than my family, the thing I value the most in my life are my friendships. I never anticipated how hard it would be to maintain my friendships as I got older. But, it makes sense – we’ve all moved farther away from each other, and have families, careers, and other commitments that make it hard to find the time to spend with each other. It takes work, and we have to plan things far in advance.
Months ago, my friend Brianne emailed all of us to schedule a day together. After much emailing, we finally found a date two months in advance that worked for the majority of us. That day was yesterday, and it came at the perfect time. I’ve been feeling a bit listless and shut-in. I really needed some time with my friends, most of whom I haven’t physically seen since before James was born.
My friends have held me up a LOT over the last six years. We have all been through so much together. I like being around the people who knew the Old Me. And even though we text, talk, and email and do all those other things to stay up-to-date with each other, there’s no substitute for face-to-face interaction. I wanted to hug them, and see their eyes when they were laughing.
Brianne arranged for us to spend the day on a gorgeous sailboat (thank you, Brianne!), and even though the weather was absolute crap (solid fog), we didn’t care. We were together, and we were celebrating sixteen-plus years of friendship.
There was also food made to look like animals, and who doesn’t like that?
We talked about life…babies…boyfriends…Jackie…we laughed a lot and we were together, and it was exactly what I needed. I feel ten pounds lighter (which I am not, because HELLO food shaped like animals!) and a million times more centered and patient.
I don’t know what I would be without all of my friends.
sherri says:
I know what you are feeling. I am at a point right now where I need time with friends so bad I want to scream. Not the friends I have nearby, but the college friends I adore and miss every single day. Sadly they are half way across the country.
Savannah101 says:
Have you considered planning a trip?
sherri says:
Oh, of course. But, with 3 kids and a husband and work there never seems to be time or money. Hoping next summer…
Sue says:
Always so much fun, Heather. I spent the afternoon, yesterday, lunching with 2 of my best friends, and even tho we live in the same town,,,,and get some phone time every now and then,,,,you always come away feeling great after spending a fun time with them! Your pictures are beautiful.
defendUSA says:
I don’t have friends from college…I made some life longs in the Army. Sadly, two years ago, I lost the best friend I’ve had in my life because of things that I never knew existed in her heart- or maybe I did and thought knowing wouldn’t affect me. Being 49 and trying to make a new friends is not something I can tackle.
Be glad for the successes, share whatever you can and be there for the failures and the unfortunate events. Don’t judge others because they have a different value system than yours- Until you’ve walked in their shoes, you will never know the reasons behind the actions and the thoughts.
Just be kind or be silent if you cannot. The unkind will rear its ugly head over and over in your heart or theirs. Never say things you cannot take back. I have lived by that rule since I was 17. It has boded well, and even though I don’t have my best friend, I can say by this rule, I have no regrets. It just happens that today is the day it all went to hell 3 years ago.
As you would cherish your husband and your family, you must also cherish friends!
defendUSA says:
Apparently I can’t count. 3 years when the trouble started. 2 since I let it go. It all hurts. Boo.
amourningmom says:
So glad that you were able to have a day with good friends. I am certain that I could not have made it through some of my darkest days without good friends. Thinking of you and Jackie extra this month. Sending hope and hugs.
Shelly says:
So happy for you, it sounds like you really needed this well-deserved day out. It’s so important to remember to take time for yourself.
Glenda says:
So happy for you! I get to see my best friend of 28 yrs. who is like a sister this coming Friday for the long weekend. We try to meet up in different parts of the states. We text daily and talk at least once a week. We’ve been there for each other through the good and the bad.
True friends become your family and are forever!
Jeanie says:
So glad you were able to have this outing. I get together with old (I mean old! We graduated 51 years ago) friends at least once a month. There are anywhere from five to nine of us, and we have lunch at various restaurants. A few of the girls I even went to elementary school with. Something for you to look forward to.
Paula says:
I have found over the years that I have just begun to be with Mr. a lot. It’s a bit depressing. I think my friends find me to either be a complete fun – sucker or a complete party animal. Then I meet people who say they “LOVE” how funny I am and that they wish I were their friend…and then I never hear from them again.
I’ve never been one to be able to be friends with women. I just can’t do it and I don’t know why. I can be friends with a guy and be best buddies but women? They don’t like me. Well, Mary likes me but that’s because she has to – we’ve been best buddies since high school and her parents were there for me when mine own wouldn’t.
Wow. This depressed me LOL! Not really but I need to schedule some face time with my best friend.
Nix says:
I’m so glad you have this kind of support group. I wish I did but I’m like several of the commenters here and am sad to say I don’t really have friends. I envy these close knit relationships sometimes. Glad you feel recharged!!
Jess says:
I’m with you–spending time with friends, especially old ones, is the best.
I am mostly commenting to say how much I love the animal-shaped fruit! Way cute.