Ever since I moved out here to NYC, my family and friends have been sending me things. This is anything from Jackie sending me mail to Woodsy & Christi bringing me a burrito to Mike lugging out my guitar. I love getting these things because it reminds me that there are people all the way across the country that are thinking of me. My parents are the champs of the package. I think my mom was secretly sad that Kyle and I didn’t go to school far away so she could send us elaborate packages. My parents have sent me my favorite chips that I was craving, holiday decorations, and magazines. They also send me cards, all the time. I love getting home from work, opening my mailbox, and seeing a card from home inside. Yesterday, I was blessed with a funny Valentine that held a new friend. That’s right. A finger puppet. I called my parents to thank them, and my mom told me that she’d sent the card weeks ago and since I hadn’t received it she’d assumed it had been lost in the mail. I assured it that I’d received both the card and the puppet, and that they were both in good condition, although the puppet was a little smashed. I promised my mom that I would never let him out of my site, and I brought him to work today to enjoy “Take Your Puppet To Work Day.”
This is Ocho O. Otto, Octopus.
Ocho had never been to an office before, let alone one so swanky and full of energy. Needless to say, he was shy at first. He was worried that everyone would look at him and be like, “Yo, you’re an ocotopus.” Then my friend Will Ferrell came to visit. Ocho immediately warmed up to him – who wouldn’t? Here he is posing with Will outside my office (Will doesn’t like it when I don’t take his calls).
Here Ocho shows that he knows how to fight on. He’d put up the victory sign, but he has no fingers. He’d also like to say he’s pissed at Mike Williams for going pro early. Boo! Mike Williams, you most definitely are NOT Gangsta.
In the office we were blessed with the presence of the Chairman. He doesn’t come in very much. Ocho asked him if he would pose for a picture, and the Chairman obliged. Ocho is coming out of his shell!
After the excitement of the morning’s visitors, I needed to get some work done. Ocho offered to help me.
Ocho manned the iPod, making sure the tunes were funky-fresh.
Upon exploring my office, Ocho stumbled upon my decorative Guinness bottle. I told Ocho not to drink it, but when my back was turned, he must have…
…because the next time I saw him, he was passed out in my Easter candy. Oh, Ocho, you bad boy.
Luckily, he woke up from his drunken nap in time to get some batting pointers from Shawn Green. Shawn shows Ocho how to swing through the ball. Too bad Ocho is right handed.
Ocho is a college graduate! It’s true. He’s actually in med school, studying to be an Ophthalmologist. Until then, he has to beg to pay the bills.
To blow off a little steam, Ocho put on some dance music and boogied down.
Ocho spies my box of Reese’s Swoops!
Ignoring the potential dangers, Ocho makes a break for it and starts to eat my Swoops!
I get back from a meeting and spot Ocho eating my Swoops. I can’t believe he’d betray me like that!
I can’t believe he’d betray me like that. Look! He makes my frown lines so deep! He needs to get away from my peanut butter chocolate crack! He’s going to pay!
I had to punish Ocho for trying to eat my sweet, delicious peanut butter chocolate crack. How else would he learn?
That was Ocho’s fun day at the office! Can’t wait to watch the Oscars with him!