Before I forget, my brother wants me to clarify something I wrote yesterday. I said that our Lego Heroine, Nurse Lady, was always being kidnapped. Kyle would like everyone to know that Nurse Lady was actually very self-sufficient, and that Lego Town was big on Feminism. Obviously, my memory is not what it used to be. What can I say, I’m old and stuff. With that out of the way, I would like to talk about how sweet I am. Literally. Bugs love to get their chompers on my sweet, sweet flesh. This is unfortunate for me because I have HORRIBLE reactions to bug bites. We’re talking giant, disgusting, infected wounds with a teensy tiny bite in the center. One time, I got three sand flea bites on my right arm: one on my elbow, one on my finger, and one right between my wrist and elbow. These three bites worked together to guarantee that my entire arm swelled up to three times its normal size. Unfortunately, the finger with the bite also had a ring on it. A ring that had been passed down to be by my mother. My friends told me right away that it needed to come off, but my finger was already swollen so the ring was stuck. So they said to go to the hospital and have it cut off. Hell no! It’s an heirloom! I said I would rather lose my finger then my ring. But, the fleas won: One morning I woke up around 5 am and realized that I could not feel my finger anymore. When I looked at it, it was an ugly blue color. I quickly drove to the emergency room and had the ring cut off. Sweet blood runs in my family. My bro also has very bad reactions to bug bites. I remember one spider bite in particular on his forehead…ew, it looked like a pussy third eye. And the fact that a bug was on his face is pretty damn disgusting. Have I mentioned how much I hate spiders? I am scared to death of them. I blame Arachnophobia. Damn, just typing that word makes me squirm in my chair. Why did my parents let me see that movie at such an impressionable age? I have never recovered.